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age
26-29,
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writes: Okay so I'll tell my problem as a story just to make things easier. "Annie" was friends with "Wilbur" since freshman year of high school. Annie liked another guy named "Elias" who pretty much ruined her life Sophomore year by telling everyone she was crazy and a stalker because she was hurt by his rejection. She cried for months so it was unusual to most high school students. Wilbur liked Annie throughout this whole ordeal and was by her side throughout it all. Btw Wilbur and Elias are best friends. Annie tells Wilbur that she doesn't have feelings for him Junior year. She had slight feelings but didn't want them to breakup and ruin the friendship they had which she valued a lot. Senior year Annie tells Wilbur that she has feelings for him. They start talking. About 2 weeks into them talking Annie tells Wilbur she still has feelings for Elias and is going to talk to him about the past when he breaks up with his girlfriend. (Not because she wants to go out with him but because she knows his answer will be different when he's not tied in his unhealthy relationship His answer will be one to not hurt his girlfriend. Wilbur gets upset and says he needs space and time to think. Annie doesn't know what "space" means so she oversteps these boundaries. She tells Wilbur she has the urge to kiss him. Wilbur gets upset so they go to guidance to resolve the conflict. After finding out exactly what Wilbur wants as space, she thinks they're finally on the same page however that same day Wilbur says he no longer wants anything romantically with Annie because he waited too long for her but he still wants to be friends. Annie tells Wilbur she needs time to get over him. He agrees. In this same time Wilbur tells "Ginger" Annie's best friend that he has feelings for her and wants to go out. Ginger tells Annie she has feelings for Wilbur but doesn't want to go out with him if it'll hurt Annie. Annie, still into Wilbur, says that it will hurt her. She talks to Wilbur about how he had feelings for another girl while they were talking (which is unfair that he got mad about her having feelings for another guy) and he gets angry and says he no longer wants to be friends. They all go to guidance again to fix the situation but things are still broken. Annie and Wilbur still say hi and bye but no more than that. The reason I, Annie, came here to talk about this is I still have feelings for Wilbur and I want to go out with him still. I at least want to be friends though. I no longer have feelings for Elias and I am no longer talking to him. Ginger and I are still friends. What should I do about Wilbur? Should I give him space? Talk to him about it? How much space should I give him? How long?
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (23 November 2013):
 You should leave Wilbur alone. That is what he asked you to do.
So you do to Ginger what was done to Wilbur, how is that fair?
I'm sorry that Annie finally saw Wilbur for a good guy, but she saw it too late and by her actions with regards to Elias he lost all respect and romantic feelings for her, I don't blame him.
I don't really think Annie WANTS Wilbur, he is the "consolation Prize" for not be able to have Elias and I think she still have a crush on Elias. Til she GETS over that, she shouldn't date because it's terribly unfair to any guy.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2013): Definitely give him space! Let HIM decide when he's ready to contact you further than "hi" and "bye". You hurt his feelings changing your mind constantly about whether or not you had feelings for him but this whole time you still wanted to be friends. So he could have an everyday reminder that he couldn't have your or Ginger (which probably hurt or annoyed Ginger too but for some reason she's still friends with you). Elias is out of the picture, but probably still friends with Wilbur. Maybe you were a stalker toward him and Wilbur now heard Elias' story. Sorry, but you really messed up.
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