A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi , I need some honest advice . Dated a guy for three months ( he was waiting on his divorce to be finalised ) . He then sends by text the old line " It's not you , it's me ...I am not ready for any kind of relationship " . I felt annoyed it was by text , but felt philosophical and ready to move on with my life . Now , he wants to be friends again , go for a coffee and see if over time we can build a future. My question is - should I forget it ? The guy does not seem to know what he wants .....and I do not really want to play games ....
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female
reader, Daisy_Daisy  +, writes (12 April 2014):
 I'm with the others. He's not worth your time. If you meet up wtih him as friends and wait to see if you can "build a future" with him, he'll try to use you as his free therapist and FWB and you'll be wasting time that could be better spent with someone who is ready for a relationship.
Honest advice: avoid dating people who aren't yet divorced. Been there, done that and it was equally as unproductive as your experience.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2014): "Hey, how are you? I know I said I'm not interested but I've decided, seeing as you're the only one who paid me any attention lately and I'm feeling sexually frustrated, to let you see if you can shag me into wanting a relationship with you. No guarantees of course, but if you play your sexual cards right, then who knows?"
No chance, OP. Let him find another fool to be "friends" with and string along.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (12 April 2014):
 Yea, I'd walk away.
If you are looking for a relationship he isn't it. HE already wasted 3 months (not so bad..) but why let him waste more?
Wish him good luck and cut off and communication.
He wasn't a "friend" before. He was a guy who had no clue what he wanted (except that he wanted female company) - he is still a guy who wants company/sex but not ready for more, that is why he is pulling the :" I still want to be friends routine."
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (12 April 2014):
 Avoid. It sounds it's just all code for " let's see if I can string you along while I get you to have sex with you casually and occasionally and I keep procrastinaring forever the day when this ccmmon future of ours starts...".
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (12 April 2014):
 Phht! he is a time waster, but apart from that he gave you the tired old line via text and not face to face.
I wouldn't bother if it were me.
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (12 April 2014):
 That's up to you, really. But I'm the same as you. I don't like games or the unknown. If you've been seeing each other for three months, he should have figured out by now how he feels about you.
I would probably move on.
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