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male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I have fancied a girl who is about 6 months younger than me (we're both 16) for about 3 and a half years now.When I first met her, we barely spoke at all. I more watched her from afar. She had a massive crush on another of my friends, and they followed him about a lot. So, there was really no point in me doing anything.However, she eventualy lost interest in him (to an extent) and he's left school now. I still had little to to with her.Recently, she started using the same bus as my friends (not the one she had a crush on) which meant that she sort of became aware of me more. She waved at all three of us when she saw us, which was obviously not aimed at me specifically, even though she did shout on me to wave back once.I'm just back from a school trip which she went on, and I'm starting to think she does like me. We began talking, and I ended up spending most of the night in her hotel room with her friends, just talking etc. We sort of play-fought at one point, and she help my hand to drag me to her room as well. In her room, she stroked my hair a lot, although I did see her doing this to one of my friends, but it still seemed like a good sign.Also, her friend implied (jokingly) that she was going to ask me out during dinner. She didn't, of course. I did small things to show that I was interested, such as talking to her alone during the trip etc. On the bus, we sort of stared at one another (me calling it a staring competition to get rid of the akwardness) and she kept smiling and looking away. She made eye contact a lot as well.At home, I sort of gave away to a friend that I liked her. He's going to tell her on the bus soon (it's a bit of joke to him) and then see if she'll go out with me. I'm obviously hoping that she says yes, but I think I could cope with the rejection.My main problem is that the girl I fancy and her friend both made out that I fancied her other friend. I don't really like her, or I do, but not to the extent of the girl I originally fancied. I think that this other friend may have liked me, due to the way they were going on about her and me. She was very standoffish from me, though, and more or less told me to get out of their hotel room. The girl I fancied wanted me to stay.So... Do you think I'm going to get rejected, and even if I do, did I do the right thing in admitting that I like her? I think that I have, as I think I would have regretted doing nothing about it.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2006): I am the guy that asked the question.
Thanks a lot, Dave. Your answer was really helpful. I agree with you that I shouldn't risk never knowing because I'm scared of rejection.
Thanks again
A
male
reader, David Lewis  +, writes (9 December 2006):
 I think you should tell her how you feel. I have been rejected many times, probably more than most. Rejection is not really a bad thing when you think about it. If you are constantly fearful of rejection, then you will stay fearful and never seek acceptance.
If she rejects you, take it on the chin, but don't take it personally. I think she does like you, but that up to you what you do. If you don't ask, you may never know.
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