A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been feeling really miserable lately and I don't know how to shake this feeling off. I am 29 years old, female. I have good friends, a very loving and supportive family, a job I adore, yet, being single, I feel terribly lonely. It's like all the good things in my life mean nothing if I don't have someone to share them with. I'm in no hurry to get married or have children. I just need to love and feel loved, I need a partner, someone compatible with me. And it seems there is no such person.People always say, "You will find someone if you are open to new acquaintances." or "Once you stop looking, you are going to find him." Been there, done that. But it seems I don't fit with anyone.Have had two long term relationships. First one (4 years) was a cheater, second one (2 years) perhaps the kindest man on earth, but we were just too different and it didn't work out. After that, I was single for 4 years, with only a bit of fooling around here and there. I was OK with being alone, hoping one day I would meet someone good for me. Then, a year ago I met this man. Mutual attraction, similar interests, similar beliefs, similar level of education, endless nights of good sex, long discussions, my world was complete again. It lasted for 5 months. Never really understood what drove him away, he avoided any actual explanation. I was hurt, I felt used. I still feel used.I am moving on with my life, just don't know where to. I am back to meeting no one I can imagine myself with. I've been there before. Only now the feeling of loneliness is becoming unbearable. What is wrong with me? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, kayc1982  +, writes (7 August 2010):
I am in a similar boat with you. I am 28 years old and just don't click with anyone. I have been really hurt by certain girl in the past and have not had any real closure to this problem and it just seemes like no matter what you do with life it is just dull with out your other half. Well I wish I had an explanation or an answer but your not alone because guys go through this too. I am sorry for your feeling alone.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2008): hi there i would like some advice, i have been seeing this guy for a while, 18 months and it is long distance, thing is it used to be ace! and dont get me wrong but when we are together it is good!! fantastic! but when we are apart now, its unbearable, no replies to texts, hardly any calls, and even contact in person becoming a little to apart now for my liking, and i know he also goes on date sites and chats with others, but give him benefit of doubt my mum says but hey he may only be chatting etc, so usually its hi babe course i love you now i send and ask him things and no replys! if i am on phone to him and his mates call he will say listen will call you back and dont but if i call him and his on phone he tells me again i will call you back! i amfeeling sick every day and feel he has massively lost interest and maybe getting interest elsewhere, but his mates when they demand him he is there... i just dont know anymore i really dont... but if i query him on phone he will say talk later when u can talk properly and hang up and not answer for ages! how do i get the old man i fell in love with back?? if he is still interested halp me please
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2008): Thank you for your answer, Mandy.
I'm just so confused. It's not like it's the first time someone has hurt me. I have some experience, I am intelligent, educated, pretty, I can't be having low self-esteem, it's not supposed to happen at this age!
I keep thinking my problem is that the men I meet are not as interesting and sophisticated as I would like them to be. He was those things, even though he ended up hurting me. I'm afraid I will never meet anyone that measures up to my standards again, but not at all worried it will not work out if I do meet someone. Hence the feeling of loneliness.
But maybe you are right and I'm just rationalising and actually in denial.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 March 2008): Hi Hunny
You are still grieving by the sounds of things sweetheart, Having a relationship for 5 months and then to split up with no real explanation is a tough one to get over...Your feeling very hurt and Im not supprised and to feel used is a horrible feeling hunny..I think you need to get yourself strong after this relationship as it has left you feeling depressed and if you get strong then you will be able to deal with these feelings of being lonely and then when you feel stronger you will feel much better and able to see a light at the end of this dark tunnel you are in now, Im going to send you some self help links on self esteem, confidence, and how to deal with depression after a breakup.
http://www.selfesteem4women.com/index.php
http://ezinearticles.com/?Improving-Self-Confidence-After-a-Breakup&id=960732
http://panicdisorder.about.com/od/loneliness/Loneliness_and_Anxiety_Disorders.htm
I hope these links help in someway hunny TAKE CARE WITH LOTS OF LOVE AND PRAYERS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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