A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I seem to have gotten myself into a bit of love trouble.I was dating someone long distance when I met, well, someone else. My boyfriend and I hadn't been getting along - he said he loved me, but he would be controlling and jealous and say things to hurt my feelings (such as, "You dress like a slut."). This new guy, let's call him M., came into my work one day. I wasn't expecting myself to say yes when he asked me out but I did, and long story short I ended up leaving my boyfriend to be with him.But now he's moving over seas for study purposes, for three years, and he wants us to "try" and be a couple. But I've already done long distance and it's so hard, and stressful. And he's always very busy, and I'm not sure I could be in a relationship with someone I talk to once a week or once a month.And now my ex is calling me saying he's changed and he's willing to try harder and that he still loves me.And truth be told, I love him.I'm just all confused.Help?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (27 November 2011):
 Honey if you really loved your ex deep down you would never have left him for another guy, plus as you said he was controlling and jealous, that is who he was when you where together and behaviour like that does not just change over night am afraid. It would be a big risk you are taking getting back with him. Personally I don't think you should go there.
As for your current boyfriend, yes long distance is hard, and three years is a long time, so if your heart is just not in it, then I think you need to do what is best for you and let him go. It will probably be easier for you both in the long run.
I advice you taking some time to yourself and live a single life for a while. Because going back to your ex should not be an option just because your current boyfriend is heading away, just remember there was a good reason for you breaking up with him. Try and remember his old behaviour and hopefully this will give you the strength to stay away from him. Enjoy single life for a while and enjoy being young and going out with friends.
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