A
male
age
36-40,
*ndy00
writes:Hi Aunts/Uncles.Most of you by now know my situation:Met a girl over the internet, we fell in love, we met, we kept a long distance relationship of 240 miles going for 2 years, we went camping, I took her on Holiday about a year ago, she split up with me in June and I have struggled to move on from that ever since. In that time she has contacted me from time to time, and from each time, I have tried to maintain a friendship with her, but have eventually ran away and avoided it. In early December, her father died due to the effects of Alcohol abuse over the years. She told me about it, and from there we spoke for 3 nights in a row, until I read on one of her web pages that she was seeing somebody she used to go to College with. This brought up pain, so once again, I fled. I haven't heard from her since... Until tonight.She sent a text to me this evening, at about 5pm, but I didn't receive it until after Midnight, which is too late to reply and is VERY VERY frustrating!! The message seems innocent enough. She merely asked how I was, and how college is going. She mentioned that it's been a while since we last spoke, and she hopes I'm okay. So yes, innocent, but now I'm left wondering WHY she has text me. It's probably just to see how I am as the text says, but I have a tendency to look into things too much, so I start to think "Is this a way of showing me that she still cares for me, and that she misses me?" "Did her and her b/f split up?", ect. Stupid little things like that.Please, does anybody have any theories as to why she's contacted me? I know the answer is probably staring me in the face. What should I do from here? Do I answer her questions and return them to her, or do I just ignore her? She must obviously want to talk to me in some way for her to contact me time and time again... She broke up with me, but yet it's her who is doing all the contact.Please guide me!! I've tried so hard to move on since she ruined last year, and yet she keeps coming back, and I don't know what to do.
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broke up, fell in love, long distance, move on, on holiday, split up, text, the internet Reply to this Question
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female
reader, happytochat  +, writes (6 February 2008):
Why did she text you? There are many reasons why she may of. It could of been just a friendly text, seeing how you were etc... She probably does still care about you even though you may not be dating, im sure you will have a special place in her heart always. Maybe shes having some problems with her bf and needs a male opinion. I know of alot of people who when people have fights with their partners and feel that maybe their relationship it is at risk of ending, they start talking to old bfs/gfs, its sorta like a ego boost. So yes there are lots of reasons why! And hoenstly I dont think I can tell you which one it is. The best way to find out, would be to reply and see what else she has to say.
As for what do you do...well that depends. Do you want to move on from her? If so, I think that keeping in contact with her would only make it harder. I would sugest time away from her, so you can move on. You may need to even to ask her to not contact you so you can move on with your life and hopefuly she will respect that.
If however you still have hope for the two of you, then you should really tell her how you feel. Dont just sit and wait for her to come to you, you have to tell her how you feel. That way she can tell you if you two stand a chance again and if not, then you can move on knwoing that you gave it your best shot.
Hope this has helped and I hope you work it out soon.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (6 February 2008):
 If you have no more interest in her or your love has died, just ignore those text.Move on and she will disappear from your life forever.
If you want to connect back, then reply.
She is probably now single or alone and wants to reconnect back with you. Once bitten twice shy.
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