A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello all, I have been obsessing about this for days now and I would really love some advice. Ok so here is the whole story. I met this guy about 3 or 4 years ago and we were only friends through my boyfriend at the time. Well about a year and a half after I met him we started hanging out, My boyfriend at the time, him, and me. So I started to develop mild feeling for him at first then my boyfriend (who is also his good friend) and I broke up. I moved in with this guy for about a month while I found a new apartment by myself. After that we were a bit closer and my feeling for him started to grow even more. Well my boyfriend and I got back together for a little over a month. Just long enough for us to all decide to be room mates together. Ok so now we are all living together and then my boyfriend and I break up again (for good this time because he cheated). My boyfriend moves out and my room mate and I are spending all this time together alone and doing all kinds of fun things together and going out to clubs and movies and stuff. So now I really feel like I am falling in love with my room mate. I knew there was sexual tension between us but neither one of us would do anything because of my now ex boyfriend. So then about 3 days ago my room mate and I got drunk while watching a movie and I put my head on his shoulder and when I looked up at him to say something we ended up kissing and messing around a little bit. Well my room mate had already had previous plans for this other girl from out of town to come over and spend the week with him but it is just messing around between them not any kind of relationship. Well after he kissed me he said something along the lines of "Shit that girl is still coming from out of town". Which led me to believe that he was thinking that what happened between us was more than just a little messing around and maybe the start of something. Well I got kind of flustered and said "well why would I care?". Nothing more happened since that night. So yesterday I asked him if the only reason what happened, happened was because we were a little drunk and he said he "wasn't sure" and then said I am "definitely not unattractive" and he also said "in retrospect he is a little wiereded out". I am really confused by his answers and it took me almost half an hour to work up the courage to even ask him what I did so I couldn't ask him to clarify. Also he asked me what my feeling were on what happened and I dodged the question. I felt that after his responses i couldn't tell him my true feelings without jeopardizing our friendship as well as our living arrangement. So now I am sitting here crying my eyes out because I don't know what to think or what to say and he is with the girl that he had the previous arrangement with. All I know is that I really feel something for him. I am not sure if it is love but if not it is damn close and to me that kiss meant so much but I don't know what it meant to him. So based on what I have described can someone please tell me what they think he is feeling as well as what I should do. Thank you. 3
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broke up, drunk, got back together, kissing, moved in, roommate Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2011): Booze + women = fail... always. this situation would be a lot more clear if you decided not to drink. regards.
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