A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey, this is a kind of relationship question, about my son. He is 15 months old and has major anger issues.When he was born, he never cried for milk, the midwifes kept telling me to feed him different ways, a different midwife, different time they'd say between feeds. me and hubby decided to feed him every 4hours. he's never cried for food so we've just done what we thought best. He now eats more then me and hubby put together!!He developed colic from around 2 months old, colic drops helps this.He then started to cry a lot after 6 months, which wasnt colic, we had no reason why. He wasnt cold, hot, hungry, thirsty, bored, tired etc, all the things you check for. Health visitors gave us things to try, we did them and it still didnt help. They said it might be because we are stressed which it wasnt because we werent stressed anymore. Then they said it was a phase. i asked on a well known mum's forum and they kept telling me it was a dairy intolerance, no matter how many times i said it wasnt, they insisted it was, in the end i left the site.Our son now has stopped crying all the time but is very moody and has bad tantrums, we have no idea what triggers them, he can be sat playing one minute and flip the next, throwing his toys, screaming. Now he's got into the habit of hitting, kicking, pinching, slapping and scratching us, hubby has now got regular scratches on his face from our son. We try discipline him but how do you discipline a 15month old?? what we do is when he has a tantrum or hits, we give him a warning like "[child's name] do not pinch mummy, thats naughty, next time you do that your going to bed" if he does it again, we put him in bed. He isnt walking yet so we cant use a naughty step, he wont stay there, i guess because he doesnt understand yet, we put him in his cot to calm down, we leave him until he does and then go up n have a kiss and a cuddle. Even though he doesnt cry all the time he is still very moody, he is very clingy and if we leave the room he screams, he wont play with his toys much, when he does, he gets bored easily. is this normal? We have an appointment with a paediatrician this month because we kicked up such a fuss about his anger and crying. personally i think he might have something like ADHD, i looked though the signs of ADHD and our son has at least 3/4 of them, even hubby agrees, i dont dares ask the paediatrician about it though because she'll probably laugh. maybe it is a phase but hes been like this for nearly a year now, even though we find it easier to cope with now (because we put him in bed when hes tantruming) its very hard to see your baby turn so quickly and have tantrums. Its like he's hit the terrible 2s very very early. any advice?? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2011): First don't put him in his crib if he is naughty. He will learn to truly hate being there and then bedtime will become a major issue. I have a 22 month old who sounds almost exactly like your little one. When he was younger he had "colic" from 2 months until he was 6 months. We found out at 6 months that his stomach hadn't fully developed and he had acid reflux which could have been what was causing his crying fits. Once we started him on the meds we were prescribed his crying stopped. My son pinched, bit, hit, and pulled hair and had done this since he could walk (9months). He finally stopped at 18 months but only after very strict discipline that was even hard on me. I disciplined my son by taking him away from the situation and putting him in time out in a corner (away from everyone and everything). I started this at a year old. I left him in it for a minute at a year, a minute and a half at 18 months, and now it's 2 minutes. Most if not every time he tried to leave his corner, but I would put him back. Soon he stayed on his own and realized when he acted out he couldn't play with his toys or see mommy or daddy. He rarely ever acts out now unless he is stressed, tired, or sick. You just need to find out what works best for you with discipline and stick to it. I would still encourage you to bring up ADHD with your doctor, the sooner it gets diagnosed the sooner you will have a happier healthier baby (if it is indeed adhd).
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