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age
22-25,
writes: augh! its so annoying to watch one friend or another snogging the face off of their boyfriends when you don't have anyone to even like you yet, right? don't know the first place to look for a special someone? why not try doing something you like. singing, dancing, art, cookery, you name it. just something you like thats for both boys and girls? that way if you see someone you like, you can have something to talk about, 'cos you're both interested in it! "wow! that guy is an angel." you think to yourself as you secretly drool all over him. but, there's absolutely no way your gonna tell him to his face that you like him. you'd rather kiss a frog! but, hey, you don't have to tell him to his face. you can do other things. say hi a lot, and then maybe you could say something like, "whoa, you're good at doing that." well you don't have to say "that" it could be whatever. painting for example if you were in a art class or club. just small talk. after small talk, maybe ask him if he wants to partner up with you for an upcoming project. then, throw in a few questions if you can whilst doing the project together. on the other hand if he already has a girlfriend, then trouble's heading your way. anyway, just keep complimenting him. for example: if you were doing a project on how why it's good to brush your hair, you could say, "hey, i think you've got great hair." you could even touch his hair, or just run your fingers through your own. if he says something like, "wow! thanks. you've got great hair too." once your kinda good friends, you could hug him goodbye, or touch his arm, or put your hand on his when you both laugh at something. or you could whisper in his ear, and see how he reacts. it doesn't have to be a secret, just anything. he may lean his head towards you if he likes you. i've done all this, so trust me on this. and guys, leave your comments to tell the girls other ways on how to tell if i haven't mentioned it! thanks for reading! xxxxxx!
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionoooooohh. i get you! sorry, was just really confused.
A
female
reader, Abella  +, writes (21 February 2014):
 Hi
The article was an interesting perspective on teen thoughts regarding interest in guys around your own age.
Some people are especially sensitive about having their hair touched. How would you feel if you had fixed your hair exactly how you like your hair to look and a guy came over to you and left your hair looking messy?
To some people rifling your hands through a guy's hair is demonstrating that the girls sees herself as 'claiming' the guy as 'her guy' - when all you think you are doing is having a light flirtation or less with the guy.
Many people are sensitive about a person touching their hair.
Beyond that some people see it as patronizing to touch the top of a person's head/hair - like an Uncle or Aunt might do to a little child.
At it's worst - in some cultures it is regarded as an insult and a mark of disrespect to do this.
sometimes when we are young we have not yet realized that there are social barriers to doing things that seem harmless but are viewed differently by various cultures.
If you ever study Anthropology at University you will gain a greater understanding of these issues.
And the other issue is that sometimes something is done to a person, and they cannot work out why - but what was done makes the person feel uncomfortable.
Society norms are created over hundreds of years and people pick up on these norms, often without thinking about why.
But such norms do exist.
Always better to err on the side of caution rather than be known as a person who is over familiar or is ignoring the norms in society.
By far the best way to interest boys is to ask them an Open question and then Listen, listen,listen.
Guys love a good listener.
Open questions start with...
''how did you....
''what made you....
''what happened then.....
An open question cannot be just answered with a yes or a no.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you, Abella. but i don't understand how touching a guy's hair is pushy? but is the article good?
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (20 February 2014):
It's my view that most young guys 13-16 are often far more shy than girls realize. So keep it simple and don't appear to be too pushy.
Running your fingers through their hair? Noooooo! That's too forward and pushy. And that's for later when they are closer to you.
He has a girlfriend already? So do you still flirt? Nooooo! Not unless you want to alienate other girls who know his girlfriend.
In the 13-15 age group there is no rush. There is so much time ahead of you to devote time to guys as you reach ages 16 and 17 and 18. Prior to the ages of 16 and 17 and 18 why bother to be a 'test dummy' for the guys?
Guys mature more slowly than girls.
But what about the guys in the 13 to 15 age group who are pushy? These are the guys to avoid. Such pushy guys are not looking for a 'relationship' even if they have inkling of what a 'relationship' is. Instead the pushy guys are just into numbers. Numbers they will boast about to their friends. Nothing being sacred to them. If you allow any liberties his friends will be told in detail, often with embellishment. If their pushy actions gain any traction it will still be all about them and what they have been able to achieve.
So what are the lessons?
1. School comes first. Getting good marks will do you far more good than how well you are doing at being interesting to particular boys.
2. Most boys have mothers. Mothers of boys are often very protective of their beloved sons. So being too pushy with a Mom's beloved son is not likely to impress a boy's Mom.
3.You do not need to flirt with pushy boys. If anything you just need to step away from pushy boys. Pushy boys want numbers so they can boast to their guy friends about how many girls, how many liberties the girls permitted, how often they are successful. Basically a blow by blow description designed to elicit envy amongst their guy friends.
If this response seems a bit tough then the good thing is that there will be hundreds of opportunities in the future for you to connect with nice guys in the future.
Allow the guys to mature a little more and allow yourself to do the same.
And in a few years time you will be more aware of what qualities define a really nice guy who is worthy of your time and your attention.
One thing you can start doing now is to observe.
Observe the qualities you would like in a guy. Define the character traits that make up a guy you can respect.
Character is developed over time. The guy you see aged 13 to 15 has only just started to develop from child to teen. Later he will go from adolescent to emerging young man. He will still be developing his character even into his 20s. There should never be a rush to settle down too early. His studies and then establishing his career are far more important priorities for guys who will be worthy of your consideration later.
Guys who don't care about their studies, who don't even try to think about a career and are happy to settle on a lifestyle that involves a dead-end job or worse not even trying to get a job will only cause you pain in the future.
The guys worthy of your consideration in the 13-15 age group are likely to be the guys who treat their studies as their top priority. Such guys can still be your friends, but flirting and being over-familiar may be counter-productive. Instead just be their friend. Don't try too hard.
When these nice guys later start to think about dating they will remember the nice girls who behaved honorably and did not seem too pushy to them.
So relax when around boys.
Concentrate on observing guys and what makes them tick.
Try to define the qualities that you admire in nice guys.
Put your pent up energy into your studies and just enjoying life and developing long term friendships. Include some active involvement in some sports - like walking or swimming or cycling.
And develop some hobbies that you enjoy..
Over time you will come to know what qualities you do admire and respect in a guy. And that way you will know, later, when you meet that guy, some time in the future.
My good wishes to you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the question@YondaCheese! Well, thanks for reading it! and yeah, i'll try and see what else i'm good at to give advice on that. What do you want me to write about? Anyone, add your suggestions about relationships. Or add a question about this article, and i'll answer it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2014): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questiongirls too, share your ideas.
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