A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:*OPs own title*I have been with my girlfriend for nearly four years. We were very exclusive, very quickly. Early on in the relationship I found out that she had been talking to her ex on the phone regularly, and even that he had tried to talk her into leaving me and getting back to him. I felt very uneasy about it at the time and confronted her about it. She basically apologized. Now, a long time later, I find that while we had been living apart for a year, she had been seeing a guy a lot more often than she would have liked me to believe. She had moved a lot of her stuff into his house for "storage", and they had been in touch nearly every day. I have no real way of knowing what exactly they have been up to together. But it is clear that her "storage space" for her stuff had really been his apartment, and that she had clearly been seeing him way more frequently than she would have liked me to believe. Later she moved in with me and kept talking to him on the phone very frequently; when confronted she was very touchy and said he was her business partner and I was overly jealous.Fact is, she had been very jealous of me, for no particular reason, throughout.She is a sweet girl and I want to believe that she just made some "white lies" to avoid upsetting me. If I confront her, she will understand that I've been doing some snooping on her, which I feel bad for anyway. What should I do?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2010): UPDATE! Thank you all for your helpful comments! I have confronted her with the situation and with the fact that I think there is something wrong. She has appeared patient but not come out with any information at all that I did not know already.
I am distressed now. None of all this might be such a big deal. But if she keeps short of telling me the truth, what can I believe at all? And regardless of what "evidence" I confront her, I get the feeling that she will admit just that and nothing else.
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (18 February 2010):
I agree with you. There is a lot going on here that's too secretive, and I think before you can let it drop or confront her, you need to find out more.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): CaringGuy thank you for your quick answer.
This guy is definitely in some kind of business relation with her so she is not totally lying. But the whole thing stinks to high heavens: if they are solely doing business together, why so much involvement and, more importantly, why all this cover-up?
I want to believe that she has grown closer to me now and all this is behind her. But I am lacking the closure.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): hmmm... I am not so sure that she is as sweet as she seems. I would def do some more investigating as to who this "business partner" really is. I know that if I truly care about my signifigant other I would be open to any questions being asked. Only because if I truly cared about him I wouldnt want him to think that there was another guy. Good Luck!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (18 February 2010):
Hmm. I think her jealousy and quick reaction to your suspicions are a big indicator that you're not the only guy she's seeing. I really find it very unlikely that he's just her business partner. There are a few too many things going on here. Maybe she's not as sweet as it seems. I think you just need to do a bit more digging and find out what this business partner it exactly.
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