A
female
age
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*reams and hope
writes:i have been with a man for 10 years. about 4 years ago I kicked him out because of problems with my mom. she died in 2010. We talk of getting back together but he uses this as a excuse of why we have not. we went on vacation together in 2012. he came to see me on valentines day 2013. but that is all he has done to show he cares other then words. no action. he tells me he Loves me and wants a future together. grow old together. but needs time to get over this. i feel like i am being played.i want all and he gives only words. is there hope or should i try and move on? he won't listen to why and how i feel.
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (22 March 2013):
 He just wants your money
it's over and done...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2013): "I never looked at us being broke up."
But that's you were.
"The problems we had were my family."
But it still broke you up, you weren't able to get past those problems and had to break up.
Look it's been long enough now OP for him to get over stuff, he's just stringing you along, not letting go but not wanting you to move on either.
It's time walk and it's time to cut him out of your life for good, why? 4 years is enough time to waste on having him in your life and pining for something he's not going to give you.
Your username says it all, 4 years of dreams and hope OP, time to come back to reality and start afresh.
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female
reader, Dreams and hope +, writes (21 March 2013):
Dreams and hope is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe has just called and is mad at me because I won't help him with money. I have given him $750.00 in 3 months. Says if he meant anything to me I would help him to get on his feet. He says now if he didn't have money problems we would be together. I won't help him anymore because of the way I feel. He has broke up and says he is returning all of my stuff. If we were living together I would help more. Am I wrong for saying no?
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female
reader, Dreams and hope +, writes (21 March 2013):
Dreams and hope is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI never looked at us being broke up. When we were together it was perfect. The problems we had were my family. I have a lot of guilt. I have sent him cards and gifts and tring to be patient be I feel like I am going to explode now. Should I tell him all or none. I can not do this any more. Thanks to all this helps to get things off my chest.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2013): I think in your heart you're ready to give up. Things have now changed and all he can do is punish you over the past. It may take him more time to get over it than you are able to wait. Throwing someone out is pretty serious, and the experience may be pretty traumatizing.
I'd say, don't burn any bridges. Gently let him go. Get on with your life, and start seeing other people. His conflicted feelings will eventually turn into an excuse for mistreating you. Pent up resentment is the reason he goes back and forth.
Time to move on.
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female
reader, Dreams and hope +, writes (21 March 2013):
Dreams and hope is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank You
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A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (21 March 2013):
Sometimes after a seperation and whem you get back together again things are never the same.Time apart can change peoples feelings some would say the magic goes.Go with your gut feeling because if he will not LISTEN to you what is the point.Give yourself time and space and move on and hopefully you will meet some nice man that will LISTEN and respect your feelings .Kind Wishes Nora B.
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 March 2013):
 Seems like you are his back up plan in case he can't find greener grass.
What exactly is it that he needs time to get over? That you kicked him out 4 years ago? If he is not "over" it by now I don't think he will be any time soon.
Yes, I think he is all words no action and I would stop wasting time on him.
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