A
male
age
36-40,
*onystarkben
writes:Me and my girl go out to bars / clubs quite a lot and a lot of the time,she dances with her girlfriend(s) and if i don't dance with her, i chill at the bar with my friends. She says to me how she loves what i do, as it shows i trust her and i know she can handle herself . Her ex was very possessive and used to not let her dance or punch any guy that came up to her. i see guys trying it on, but i can see my girlfriend handle it, and it's been all good.Anyway, please bear in mind that i am not a fighter or anything - i hate violence and i'm only a small guy - anyway, my girlfriend went for a cigarette with her best friend and i said i would be out soon. I went out and i saw this guy with his hands on my girlfriend's waist, pushing her against a wall and she and her friend were trying to get him off. It sounds crazy but i don't know what happened, it was like i wasn't in control - i swept my girlfriend up ( literally) and told the guy to go away and moved him away with my arm and took my girlfriend outside. She was pretty freaked out and i kept looking back to see if the guy had followed - he had but literally i was ready for anything then, and my heart was going so fast. She was really happy i had come out when i did, but looking back on it today, it's weird as i didn't think i would act like that. Is this a normal guy thing?
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female
reader, Sweet-thing +, writes (22 May 2012):
 Yes it's totally normal. Your instincts to protect your loved one kicked in and frankly it ended pretty calmly. So consider yourself lucky and tell your g/f next time she needs to watch how much she drinks and be more aware of her surroundings when she goes out to smoke. In fact, you should probably go out with her, it is a bar and anything can happen when people drink and lose control of their judgement.
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (21 May 2012):
 There is a difference between hitting on and assaulting. If my boyfriend did anything beyond coming up and quietly putting his hand on my shoulder or something equivalent, I would be seriously embarrassed and angry. It would make me feel like he didn't trust me.
Now if a guy was shoving your girlfriend against a wall with his hands on her waist while she resisted, that's borderline/possibly leading to assault. You wanted to protect someone you cared about. It's completely normal and a good thing to do. Like Cerberus said, what else would you do? Just stand there while a guy tries to hurt your girlfriend?
You did the right thing.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2012): Yeah, I've spent the night in a cell more than once for dealing with guys who go too far.
My girlfriend is able to handle herself too and actually likes being hit on to a certain degree but be too forceful with her and you'll get a broken nose for your troubles if I'm in good mood.
OP any guy who isn't willing to protect his partner from all kinds of threats, physical, emotional, mental is worthless in my opinion.
Is it normal for a guy to be willing to step in and protect his girlfriend? Of course, what other choice do you have? Standing there watching certainly isn't one is it?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 May 2012):
 I think wanting to protect your GF is a basic instinct. You didn't overreact, you ended the situation. Some guys would have beat the living daylights out of the guy others would have been mad at their GF, you know? Every person reacts differently to a situation. I think you handled it very well.
I think if anyone didn't behave within a "normal" pattern it was the other guy. Forcing himself on a girl is just revolting.
You seem to trust her and it shows, so keep that up.
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