| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: i went through a terrible break up this year and found my life to be shattered. i lost friends, people i considered family and numerous material possesions. i lost my future, i had it all maped out and it now seems to have been cruelly snatched away from me, i have no self confidence very little self worth and cant look forward. i should be happy i have a bright and promising future ahead of me and a brilliant career path so why do i feel so low, i have met this guy, who loves me unconditionally, he is funny, caring and we get on really really well and like the same things but physocally im not attracted to him like i was my ex, this guy is everything my ex wasnt and more, he is a brillant man and i feel like the lowest of the low because i dont know what i want, he is talking marriage and kids which is what i want so why i am i hung up on my ex, i really think it could work with this new guy i just need to get over the fears that my ex installed in me, please your brutal honesty would be appriciated.
View related questions:
confidence, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, pica +, writes (27 October 2006):
You're just not ready yet - that happens. Maybe you're ready for some dating and TLC but not talk of marriage and kids. That's okay. I think you should sit this new guy down and explain things to him if you haven't already. Don't bother to look too far ahead just yet - concentrate on having a good life day-to-day. If that's not fast enough for him you may need to let him go. Make sure you're doing things that don't involve him - have some space for yourself. A big break-up can be devastating especially when you lose big bits of your life. You need time to rebuild - take it easy and enjoy yourself. Do new things, set yourself some new goals. When you're ready you'll know - this guy, or someone else, you'll be strong enough to make that decision when you have to. Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2006): i completley understand how you're feeling, thats exactly how i am feeling right now except for the part where you have a guy in your life right now, i dont. i still love my ex and it kills me not knowing what he's doing or where he is sometimes, because he was not only my boyfriend a month and a bit ago but was also my bestest friend. i am just 19 and i go to college, my ex is in some of my classes and it hurts to know we're not even talking! 3 weeks ago i felt shattered and worthless, all i had i felt was taken away from me and imade the biggest mistake of my life i took something i shouldn't have. And as a result had my stomach pumped and had not woken up for 4 days straight, i was discharged a week later all because i couldn't handle the fact that i couldn't move on. Don't get me wrong i still think of my ex, but one thing i have learnt from this devastating ordeel is no man is worth your tears, if a man is not man enough to understand and consider how he has left a situation he is the loser not you! no one deserves to feel heartache or that feeling of emptiness thats left behind. The bestest thing is for you to be straight with the current guy and spend as much time as you possibly can with your family, at the end of the day you can choose your friends but not your family. All the best for the future x
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 October 2006): ive been in a similar situation.i thought i was over my ex and moved on to the most wonderful,caring guy ever.however i realised that all i was doing was leading him on.i really wanted to love him but he just wasnt my ex and i had to finish it as i knew it wasnt right.its best to end it now before he gets hurt.
...............................
|
