A
female
age
30-35,
*enna0727
writes:Well, I'm 21 years old and I'm still a virgin. I feel more ashamed of this than "happy" because it seems virtually everyone I know at this age has lost their virginity, including my younger sister. I've only had one boyfriend and that was for about two months when I was 19 years old. I didn't stick with him because it just didn't feel right; we were too different from each other.I don't feel that I'm all that pretty enough to even have a boyfriend, although some guys have been interested in me... it's just that I am not attracted to them. More than just physically.I feel that I am being too picky with guys. I feel that because of it, I'm never going to lose my virginity as well. I know it's a big deal to lose your virginity, but I also often feel left-out because I haven't lost it. Other girls talk about their experiences and I have nothing to say.Do you think I still have plenty of time? Do you think I am being too picky? If you have ANY advice I would greatly appreciate it... thank you so much!
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2010): to be quiet honest with it make you to get a longtime respect and full dignity when you lose it to the right guy. don't get pressurize by anybody or people are saying it is a shame at 21 to still be a virgin.pls, pls, pls wait until u meet the right guy.98% of these guy respect virgins and will always want virgins..
it will also make the guy to believe more in you, u've not been sleeping around, u have waited for the right guy. i so much respct u for still being a virgin at that age how many girls can wait till that moment.it is a thing t be proud of.pls be happy as from today henceforth.cheers
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2010): Yes you still have time. BUT, what you need to do right now, today, is figure out what kind of guy you're looking for, and what your views about sex are. Also, find out what makes you happy (hobbies, interests etc.). I guarantee that if you figure these things out then this won't be an issue.
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female
reader, lalagirl +, writes (24 November 2010):
I'm 21 and I'm still a virgin. I'm not ashamed of it nor am I pressure to lose it. I'm quite happy, tbh...But I guess it depends how we view this and where your environment is. I am surrounded by friends who are still virgins and we have positive views about this. Honestly, people who has given into sex at an earlier age were either 1) pressured 2) going with the flow 3) did it out of their own will. When my friend got married and lost her virginity to her husband, she was gladly to share her experience with us. I mean she was quite in-depth with her first sexual intimacy with her husband, but she knew where to draw the line as well. I thought it was helpful that our married friend would share some of her experience with her virgin friends, lol. Honestly, I'm not ashamed of it. If people want to bash me or make fun of me, I could always say the same back to them as well...However, I do respect those who do it out of their own will and respect those who respect the virgins.
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male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (23 November 2010):
Trust me...These days, you should be really picky with guys.
Do you know why you should wait???
Let say you lost it now…Sex is really good. So you do again and again, and as much as you can. You try different guys, different positions, wild and crazy things, and you have a blast doing it.
Now fast forward 10 years from now. You meet the man of your dreams. You have sex…it is awesome, you get married, have kids…more sex, and add 10 more years, with all the positions your have tried and all the wild things you have done already.
All of a sudden, those wild things aren’t so wild any more. Sex becomes routine now, because it feels like all the other times. There is nothing new anymore, no spark, no interest for you or him. Your body burns for some good sex, something and someone who could light that fire again.
Now you flirt, sex text, or anything to get your hormones on that rush you use to have. Your husband no long appeals to you, and you are looking to cheat. You argue at home due the sexual frustration, boredom, and a need to feel alive again.
If you had waited for the right man, and waited until after marriage…Sex would take the rest of your life to explore. Everything sexual would be a spark, kinky would mean mind bending pleasure.
So…Lose it now, and stand a chance to lose more later. Or Save it, and spend a life time enjoying it.
Don’t take my word for it…Ask around or look at this site and how many people have sexual issues from boredom in their marriages or relationships. The old saying “It’s not how fast you get there, it’s the journey that counts.”
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female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (23 November 2010):
 Still a virgin at 21, good for you. I think you still have plenty of time, you are only 21 years old (i'm the same age) I lost mine because I felt pressured at eighteen to lose it and it's something that I wish I could take back.
Don't feel pressured into losing your virginity and you can never be too picky with choosing the guys that you date.
If however you feel that you would be happier to lose your virginity and fit into the crowd, than that is fine too.
Do whatever you feel will make you happy and whatever you are comfortable with.
There is no pressure (at least there shouldn't be) you will know when the right time is for you.
Good luck.
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (23 November 2010):
And as virtually every person who lost it to the wrong person early will tell you, it is better to wait for the right person. Sounds old and quaint, I know. But there are many people (more women then men), who lower their standards and lose it because of peer pressure and wind up really regretting it. In ten years time, you'll find that many of those people you know who are talking about it now will regret having lost it to the wrong person.
And there's no harm in being picky either. Shame more people aren't, because too many people pick the players. And that might be something you do unless you give yourself a break. You'll do better for losing it to the right guy, than giving loads of sex to 10 wrong guys or something.
Relax. There is time. If anything, work on your own life and confidence and make sure that the right guy will see you. Just don't go out to lose it, or you'll wind up losing it to a guy who doesn't give a damn, and then you'll keep having sex with guys who don't give a damn.
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 November 2010): From my point of view, I lost it at age 25, and an age where I honestly felt too late. I was too patient. Too unrealistic with the ideals and norms of an open society and foolishly led myself to believe Id lose it in a fairy tale way. Didnt happen.
I sense you feel pressure. I felt that too. Left out...alone with no experience. Over time that drove some serious anger into me which I attended counseling for. Ive never been a guy to be choosy, but rather cautious as to who I let in. Now, Im trying to let down my guard a little so feel free to write me :)...I feel you still have plenty of time. Sex didnt come naturally to me and so I had to make it a mission to lose it...and I achieved my goal.Youre not at that stage yet.
Try to meet people thru people like ur fam and friends as they know you best and can help you find a guy who can give you a fulfilling relationship. Be careful tho in attaching a significant amount of emotion to the act tho, cause the last thing you wanna do is be with a guy and have stuff not work out and the relationship end badly. Good luck.
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