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female
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*kgcb
writes: I have been with my husband for 10 years, married 5 yrs. We have 2 kids together. But I am so unhappy in my marriage its like I put his feelings into consideration but he doesn't mine. He is so selfish. His mom comes before me, also out of the 10 years he has kept a job down now for 3.5 years, so basically I have been holding the responsibilities down by myself before then. I have dealt with baby mama dramma where he wouldnt make her respect me, He didnt work first 5 years and plus lazy. I felt I had all these problems the first 3 years because we were shacking, so I decided to get married even though I paid for everything(small wedding) also really didnt want to marry him. I lost my job in 2003 and thats when my feelings became worse of him because he was not there for me like I thought he should have been and we were married, we have seperated before but I got back with him for our kids sake, but feelings still hasn't resurfaced. I have a purchased a house and only in my name because his credit is screwed, I still take care of most of my kids needs, dont get me wrong he helps with homework and will feed them, but basically thats it. Mainly I am tired and want out my pressure has went up and I am not happy but he cant seem the he is the cause of my stress. i even went through a depressed stage where I have lost a lot of weight because he wasnt there for me emotionally, physically, financially. We even sleep in separate rooms. He has started this second job now he thinks everything should be okay, but it's really too late now. I happy he finally is making more money because he is digging hiself deeper in debt. plus he needs to help with the kids. I am unhappy, and I need help. Please help me?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, kkgcb +, writes (18 October 2006):
kkgcb is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe problem is you are right it is up to me. I dont want him anymore I am completely not in love him but why should I stay for the kids. Is it possible that some kids turn out alright this young in age with both parents living in seperate houses? I need to just leave and stop listening to how much he loves me but he sleeps in a seperate bedroom and chose to. It doesnt bother me though. I want him gone. But thanks for your advice I will take it and run with it, Thanks!
A
female
reader, beentheredonethat +, writes (12 October 2006):
 well in your heart you already know the answer. Get out of debt if possible then get out....or just cut your losses and say whoa...you have had enough. Yet...he's working two jobs now...at least hes trying. It Is up to you. Kid bring a whole new demention into what YOU want. They want mommy and Daddy. You don't just change YOUR life any more...make sure you decision is best for them....if he has any redeeming qualities...i would try to stay as long as possible. Best of luck
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