A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:please help ive been married for 5 years, my husband dont cuddle, kiss or have sex with me unless he has been drinking, he goes out to the pub lunch time and comes back when he feels like it and thinks its ok. he constantly complains about my son and does nothing around the house. i work nights and he says i should get an additional. job i feel so unhappy but i still love him. we havent spoken for a week he says he is leaving but he comes back and gets in our bed. what does this all mean. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, angelawifey  +, writes (2 February 2011):
This guy is an insenitive man with an addiction proble. His addiction is alcohol. Until this guy comes to his senses that he has a problem he will continue to live in his own SELF SERVING world. I would let him know that you are talking with an attorney about getting a separation till he gets help. My husband was an addict and acting in the same manner. I filed for D then stopped proceedings because he told me he was going to fufill my emotional needs and guess what? He has NOT. I am so emotionally sick from his disgusting ways. I need to get out. We are better off alone than with men who treat us like garbage! Good luck. Your sone and you deserve a better man.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): I lived with this same shit for 20 years, I run 2 businesses and he has been out of work for a over a year. Pissed in the kitchen sink last night after getting so drunk and hanging al over my friend........It does not get better, my life sucks but I have 2 children and a beautiful home I do not want to break up,,,,,run like hell!
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A
male
reader, $izZle  +, writes (24 October 2010):
 So let me get this straight he has no job, does nothing to help you out, not bothered about his son nor you, irresponsible and is not bothered to check whether you are happy or not .... how dare he command you to \get another job . I can understand not having a job but not helping you, not showing any interest in your son, ignorance towards your needs all this is making my blood boil....looks like he has no love nor any respect left for you and I don't get it after all this you are still telling me that you love him. How can you possibly live with that .... I understand you love him but he don't seem to care, c'mon I know you have needs and feelings too and that you are not just an object to keep him amused. Like you said he has the couch where he keeps himself entertained all day long,the pub where he has a drink and when he comes back he has the bed to keep him entertained and when he needs sex he has you .... the way I look at it there is no love only his selfish deeds and the man has no sense of responsibility sitting around and complaining why can't he do something about it instead of complaining ....
I hope you you are reading this coz for the 1st time in my life I'm being this aggressive . .... instead of saying you are sick oh him do something about it ....
the way I look at it there are only 2 choices you have here
1) leave him and find a real man
2) keep saying you love him and take all the beating ....
you are a smart, strong and confident young woman and have every right to be happy ....
I really don't get it I have been trying to get a girl for ages now and I have nothing
then there are guys like these who have nothing yet wonderful women want to be with them ....
There is something wrong with the guys or something wrong with the girls the important thing here is the word "WRONG"
coz 2 wrongs don't make a right ..... so decide what you wanna do of the two options and say "BUCKLE UP"
*I apologize if I said something wrong, hurt you or made you sad .... the way I look at it you deserve better coz I see you trying really hard to make it work and no support from the other*
Remember it takes 2 to tango.... you need love, your son needs love most of all you need attention from some1 that cares/adores you
Take care
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A
female
reader, RGM +, writes (24 October 2010):
 Some day you will look back and wonder why you gave it 5 years to develope into this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): I know you don't want to here this but i think you should leave him. You can't stay with someone that makes you unhappy. Love is about two people working together, not one person working for the other. You deserve someone that is going to treat you like your the only person on the earth. I hope it works out for you.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (24 October 2010):
 Are you thinking he's cheating? If he doesn't come home at all or till the wee hours of the morning then I say something is up. He wants you to get a second job, does he not have one?
Well 5 years if marriage with no affection, sex, I don't know how you're still making it. Unless, you take the drunk affection as it's better than nothing..You know that it takes two to make a marriage work, communication, and trust. Have you tried talking to him an explaining that he can't go out and start drinking at 12, that he needs to stop complaining and look for a job instead of you getting a second one, and lastly that if you want to stay married both of you need to put forth the effort to make the marriage work. Seek marriage counseling for further assistance. Him saying he's leaving, but coming back to get in bed with you says he still wants to work it out, otherwise he would already be gone. If you love your husband, take the necessary steps to fix it.
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