A
female
age
30-35,
*elphelp77
writes:Dear Cupid,So i've got myself in a real pickle. I've recently broke up with my ex girlfriend of 18 months. She cheated on me once in january, and then she was so amazing to me we got back together. She then went to uni, and i moved to italy for a couple of months. She slept with another girl at uni within two weeks of me moving out there, and was sleeping with her every night before breaking it up with me to have a relationship with this girl. She lied about it the whole time though and as much as i would beg her to tell me she was with someone else because i felt that she was, she never confessed. She was still contacting me every day even though i asked her not to, and still gave me hope we could get back together (for example by letting me pay for her flights to come visit me in Rome and spoil her and show her a good time).A week before her term finished at uni she realised she didnt want to be with this girl and was still madly in love with me. I wasn't back for another week at this point so i said we'll see how it goes (bear in mind i didnt know there was another girl at all).She picked me up from the airport, it was all nice, until i checked her phone which had weird messages about someone loving her, she lied to me saying it was some girl that was just obsessed with her. Loads of stuff has happened and i havent found out once from her confessing what actually happened between her and this girl, i had to go to other sources.The complicated thing is, iv recently been talking to my ex's ex on msn (i know, its really odd), and she is amazing, we have such an amazing amazing connection, like we naturally get on have the same opinions, views, beliefs, humour, more than anyone else iv met.Issue is im so unsure what to do, i still have feelings for my ex, and i dont want to hurt her, but i think im really starting to like this girl. My ex has never shown me any loyalty and has always been willing to hurt me, but i cant help feeling guilty talking to this girl. Mainly because my ex contacts me all the time without response telling me how sorry she is and in love with me she is.Basically, im in a very confusing little lesbian love triangle, should i just keep away from it all? im only 18, start afresh? im also on my gap year so getting into anything now (however much i like this girl), might be a bit of a silly idea?anyone help anyone can give would be much appreciated, i cant really talk to my friends about it right now because the situation is really odd. Did both of our love for our ex (the girl was in love with my ex when she broke up with her to try win me back), just shift onto each other? i asked her last night and she swears it did not but maybe its a subconscious thing? also if someone does to you what my ex did to me, and lied to me the extent she did (i geuniely think she has a problem with lying it was so disgusting), can you put hope in them that theyll change if they swear they will and you do love them, or is the only option really to look for something better?thank you so so much for reading this
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broke up, cheated on me, ex girlfriend, get back together, got back together, lesbian, msn, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (27 December 2007):
 Well, I think if you read your post the message is clear. You're better off without her. Can you trust her? A relationship is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING without TRUST.
She also lied on several occassions. How long are you going to put up with this? I second the motion to DITCH HER and move on. It's not going to be easy. It's NEVER easy... I had to end my last relationship even though I loved her so much for my own sake.
I agree with Fairy Lu: "... cut your ex out completely she is a liar and a cheat and you deserve better doesnt matter how sweet she can be the truth is that she cheated and lied about it and will probably do it again so just cut her out and forget about her"
"As for this new girl see how it goes just be friends for now and if more happens then great but if not you have a good friend, your young huni you dont need the stresses of women messing you about live be free and happy and see where life takes you"
Take things SLOWLY. Get to know her first. Just be friends and if it developes into more than friends, then great. I've had my fingers burnt, so to speak, with my last girlfriend and I'm NEVER going to rush into a relationship. Take it easy and just get out and meet new people. Be yourself and if someone likes you, they'll like you for who you are and you'll know.
* DITCH HER
* CUT ALL CONTACT
* GET OUT AND ENJOY YOURSELF
* TAKE THINGS SLOW
Just my tuppence worth. Best of luck! :)
A
female
reader, Fairy_Lu +, writes (27 December 2007):
 I would cut your ex out completely she is a liar and a cheat and you deserve better doesnt matter how sweet she can be the truth is that she cheated and lied about it and will probably do it again so just cut her out and forget about her. As for this new girl see how it goes just be friends for now and if more happens then great but if not you have a good friend,your young huni you dont need the stresses of women messing you about live be free and happy and see where life takes you.
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A
male
reader, Somethingeasy  +, writes (27 December 2007):
 If you want a big pickle then you will stay with either one. If you dont want a pickle at all, then you wont bother which either one. These woman are not to be trusted.
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