A
female
age
30-35,
*oungmum89
writes:well about 4 weeks ago i told my boyfriend that i cheated on him twice, by cheating i mean i kissed them.We're not back together but we are working on things.We still see each other as much as we did before all this happened.He just wants to see if he can forgive me and learn to trust me again. The thing is i kissed one of these boys around at my friends house,a place i use to always drink at her home every friday.Tonight is friday and im stuck in bored out of my head she wont come around to my home for a few drinks. She never does. It's always been in her house.I told myself until my boyfriend can trust me again i will not go around to her house. She doesn't understand how i can just stop drinking at her home. I'm starting to think that im losing her as a friend because she doesn't seem to think that what i'm doing is right and that i shouldnt just drop everything because of my situation with my boyfriend.I am not dropping everything. i have offered for her to come around to my house for a few drinks. I work all week she doesn't work.I do be wrecked when i come home.I also have a 7yr old son to look after. I do trust myself to go round to her's and not kiss anyone again, but the thing is my boyfriend doesn't.If i went around he would just dump me. Can any of you give me any suggestions on what to do, thank you Reply to this Question
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female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (20 October 2012):
 You could fix this really easily, you know.
If your friend is a good one, you should tell her why you can't go over there. Most women understand these things!
Otherwise, you have to make a decision. If you love your boyfriend, you will happily not put yourself in any situation where that risk exists. He isn't being controlling by making this demand. You've shown yourself to be a cheater there, and you need to rebuild trust.
You either stay away from your friend's house, or you break up with your boyfriend. I wonder if you're kissing other guys that you're losing interest in your boyfriend to begin with?
A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (20 October 2012):
 Your first loyalty is to your child and your partner.
Whereas you may have known her a long time but she does not have your best interests at hand.
Rebuild the relationship with your partner. Aim to have a family 'event' with your child and your boyf every Friday.
make it fun. Build the rapport between you and your son and your boyfriend.
It could mean making Tacos at home one friday.
Making Pizza at home another Friday.
It could involved a game and then a story with your son. Before you put your child to bed. And then follow that up with a harmonious dinner for two at home with your boyfriend.
Choose to visit somewhere interesting on a Saturday instead on some occasions. So that you need a quiet early night on the Friday.
Ask your boyfriend to nominare some activities that he mught recommend.
This woman who wants you to drink at her home is not a true friend. Otherwise she would not be trying to manipulate you with her distancing herself some you until you play by her rules. She is best avoided.
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