A
male
age
30-35,
*rash3
writes:Can anyone offer me ANY sort of help please? Yesterday, me and my girlfriend were having fun like normal! Having phone calls, chating about absolutely everything! Then we started messing around with those new Facebook page banners! She set one on my page that said "I 3 Gay Porn" Then I new my sister would see it, tell my mum, who'd tell my dad... Which scared me the most because he is quite homophobic! If he heard about that he'd have came down on me like a ton of bricks! So in a scared moment, I shouted at her, telling her to change it and I wasn't happy about it! She hung up, and then started trying to break up with me! She's brought this on herself, but I feel so guilty and never want to lose her! Without her i'm just nothing, I have games and thats it! I have little social life without her!Please if there is anything I can do, fell me now! I'm breaking my heart. :(
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female
reader, DontKnowAnyMore  +, writes (17 February 2011):
 I am sorry that happened, but as a girl its a big deal breaker if my guy shouts at me at all, it seems to controlling.
But to me it sounds like the only thing you can do is to maybe make things better is explain everything (in person is best) and tell her you need her.
A
female
reader, Eilish +, writes (17 February 2011):
 Ohhh dear hun :/ well being a girl myself, I know I hate it when my boyfriend shouts at me, because he's giving me negative attention. I suppose it depends on how bad you shouted at her, like did you just tell her straight or did you proper yell at her? I think the cause of this break up is very immature, a banner on facebook? That's a bad excuse. Try and speak to her. Tell her you're sorry for shouting but your Dad wouldn't have liked it. Let her know that you won't shout at her again, and if she still acts like she doesn't want to know, then leave her. Don't chase after her because girls love that and will let you do it til you get bored, trust me, I know. If she cares about you enough, she will accept your apology.
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A
female
reader, Nime +, writes (17 February 2011):
 Your girlfriend doesn't sound very mature, does she? She might be unhappy that you yelled at her, but trying to break up with you because of something as trivial as this, something SHE started, is manipulative and extremely juvenile. Does she know how tough your dad is? If she does, it makes what she did even more immature, and heartless to boot. If I were you I would not speak to her at all (no apologies, no begging for her to come back, not even a hello), until she apologizes to you and admits what she did by trying to break up with you is manipulative and disrespectful to the relationship. Your girlfriend clearly does not seriously want to break up; she said those words because 1) she was bored (hence the gay comment) and 2) she wanted you to feel guilty for yelling at her.
I GUARANTEE you if you just ignore her until she realizes she has to apologize she will take you more seriously from now on, treat you with more respect, and she will certainly retract her wish to break up. If you cave in to her threat and beg for her forgiveness she will walk all over you from now on. You will get many more of these threats to break up whenever you try to stand up to her bad behavior or she doesn't get her way, believe me. She is testing your boundaries, you have to nip it in the bud NOW, let her know you won't tolerate her bullshit or she will be calling all the shots and probably leave you for a tougher guy down the road. She will in the end be happier with you for sticking up for yourself now; women don't really want a doormat, they want a leader.
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