A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:We are sapareted after 9 years of marrige, but he never moved out of my house. He promissed to pay rent. We still call each other husband and wife for past five years.We sleep in saparate bedrooms, we have nothing in common. We don't make love to each other.I think we are just living togather for financial support from each other. He can not keep any job more than three months and it's alwaye other person's falt offcourse. We don't love each other but keep saying " I love you" every day. Is he fooling me or I'm fooling myself?Should we stay togather with out loving each other?I think I'm wasting my life with him. I could have lot of fun with somone I like, if I look for one.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2008): I think your wasting your life too. Whilst you stay in this nowhere place, how are you gonna meet anybody else?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 August 2008): Hi, this is a terribly sad story, how long have you been living like this? I can understand the financial side of things and if this is an arrangement that you are both okay with then I guess there is no harm. What worries me is that you still portray yourselves as a couple, there is no need to say that you love each other, clearly you dont or you would not be separated. The problem with this situation is that neither of you can move on, I mean you wouldnt take someone new home knowing that your husband was going to be in the next room would you?
I think if you are going to continue living together then ground rules need to be made, also you need to discuss both of your freedom to bring whomever you want into your house, share out all of the chores etc - you are not his Wifey anymore, dont see why you should still be doing his washing and picking up after him. Dont hang onto him because you feel sorry for him or you have knowhere to go, if this cant work then arrangements have to be made for one of you to leave. x
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