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male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I like her and she likes me. We talk everyday. She checks all the boxes for wife material in my book. We are currently only friends and whenever we slip into flirting one of us pull back. We're of different religions. We will never have our families' blessing.I can't not respect my parents wishes. Where I come from, it's just not an option. The situation is very emotionally draining. Should I end the friendship? Tell her we can't be on the fence about it anymore and end it?I will be able to handle it but I worry about her. I can't imagine staying friends and be hurting all the time anymore.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2017): I've always been of the belief of doing what makes you happy. Rather than trying to please others. That way it was my choice however it works out and I will never regret not knowing or not trying. Life is short. Listen to your heart and follow it. It isn't fair for others to judge you or your relationships. What do you really want rather than trying to convince yourself you want? Takes guts to go against conformity and the majority but worth it if that's what really makes you happy. Some food for thought.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (2 November 2017):
 If you are sure you will stand by what your parents believe in and decide not to go against that then the best thing to do is to end the friendship because all you will be doing is hurting each other. It really is your decision but you do need to remember that love is not about religion. Marriage is so much more.
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A
male
reader, TylerSage  +, writes (1 November 2017):
 I don't think it really matters what your parents or anyone thinks. It matters what you think. A piece of you doesn't want to end what you two have, isn't that why you posted this question? To get reassurance that you're making the biggest mistake of you life. To get reassuance that what your mind says is right but your heart says otherwise.Do you know that Taylor Swift song where she says:"I'm sitting eyes wide open and I got one thing stuck in my mind.Wondering if I dodged a bullet or just lost the love of my life"I guess it really comes down to how deeply you feel for her. If you mentioned you can deal with the break up. Try and determine how far you think you are willing to go for this girl. If you think you can get let her go then go ahead and find someone more appropriate for you and your family.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2017): You don't have to end a "friendship" over a difference in religions. If you're talking about courtship leading to dating or marriage; then your families are likely to interfere.
Public flirtation is forbidden in some religious sects.
You have romantic-feelings and attraction to each other; so you're only frustrating yourself with the flirting.
If one of you is Muslim, and the other Jewish, to cite an example. It will send a ripple throughout your perspective families. The possibility of either converting to the others religion is a moot point.
You're stirring up more trouble for her; because in either religion (it's safe to say in most religions) women are far more likely to be ostracized. Not only by family, but by her fellow-worshipers as well. Gossip travels fast!
If you know you're hurting her, stop flirting. Just be cordial and friendly. Keep your flirtations to yourself.
You might find yourself getting attacked for it; if she comes from a very strict and fundamentalist background.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (31 October 2017):
 I think if you CARE deeply for her but you can't have a future with her maybe you two cutting the contact is for the best so you can BOTH find SUITABLE partners. Right now you are both stuck on each other even though you BOTH know that nothing can come of this.
And if you HAVE romantic feelings towards her, and she you, then you aren't REALLY "friends" either.
Sorry.
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A
female
reader, Aleisha-Jay  +, writes (31 October 2017):
 Honestly,Someone close to me recently got married to someone of another religion. If you truly love her, who is anyone to stand in the way. Love is more than religions and differences. Connections go way beyond that. If you feel as though it could work for you both then do it. Although both sides of your family will not be happy, it isn't about them and either they love you both enough to still continue loving and supporting you both in your decision or leave you both to be happy.
All I say is that it has to be worth it???
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