A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi,Recently broke up with my girlfriend and in our break we both were sexually active. The girl I slept with is around at all but the guy is as he's her friend. We got back together recently and she still posts photos of her with him and usually another guy and I feel like she is disregarding my feelings. I understand he's her friend but I feel like she is making me look stupid as she's posting the photos on social media. I would never dream of posting photos with someone you have a sexual past with once you get back together with your partner. Any ideas on how to approach this? Don't want to come across as psycho.Thanks!
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broke up, get back together, got back together, sexual past Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (26 April 2017):
 The real issue here is you both felt the need to get with someone else on a break. Real relationships don't just have breaks, they work together to make it work. Honestly it sounds like this girl doesn't care about your feelings. Because if she was serious about you she never would have slept with her friend and now claim that they are only friends again.
A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (24 April 2017):
 Yeah I think this relationship has run its course also. Breaks Only occur in dead relationships.
How can breaking up for a short while and sleeping with someone else save your relationship? Makes absolutely no sense whatsoever to me.
There's no way you're gonna be able to see them together and not get jealous or annoyed so there's no point even trying. You guys went on a break for a reason so it's clearly not working. Walk away and find someone you don't need time apart from.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (23 April 2017):
 I agree with Ciar,
I think getting back together is not a good idea at all. She SLEPT with a good friend, someone she will CONTINUE to be around regardless of how you feel and since he is a friend it's not too far-fetched that she posts pictures of him/other friends.
You seem more concerned about her POSTING pictures than hanging out with him still... That is a little weird to me. Like, her posting pictures, is done to HURT you or make you look stupid, but her HANGING out with a guy she USED for sex is totally fine?
Sorry, you both have a lot of maturing and growing up to do and YOU need to decide if you are OK with it or not. If not tell her, but don't expect her to feel the same way as you. Maybe ASK her HOW she would feel if you still hung out with the chick YOU had sex with, and posted pictures of this girl WHILE dating your GF... Maybe she needs a little perspective.
Overall? I think you would be better off with a girl who is LESS concerned with getting attention from male friends and more "naturally" inclined to be respectful of you and the relationship.
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (23 April 2017):
 The kind of person who would be receptive to a talk wouldn't do this in the first place. What you're seeing here is a lack of character and sound judgment. What you need to do is decide if this is something you can live with or not.
She likes attention and she likes to have fun and she won't take kindly to anyone standing in her way, regardless of how reasonable they may be. You can expect to be accused of being 'controlling'.
She's not a keeper.
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