A
female
age
36-40,
*issWalsh
writes:I am really confused and I would really appreciate your help.I have been at university for my first year now and I met a guy within the first few weeks.We were just mates at first and we hung out in a large group of girls and lads. He also had a long term girlfriend back at home.We started spending more time together and getting closer and of course some flirting started. Then one night after lying together and chatting about all the things under the sun and being affectionate we ended up sleeping together. This led to me worrying alot because i have never done the "One night stand" thing and i dont ever intend to. We had to keep in a secret as a friend in our group was from his home town and knew his girlfriend, therefore no one in our group of friends could go.Then we started meeting up on more occasions and things happened, not ever sex again though as i wouldnt allow it.Then one day he said he was going to choose between me and his girlfriend back home and he came back after being home one weekend and said he was going to stick with her as she had begged him.We then had a break over christmas and then when we came back slowly but surely we began meeting again.And he then finished with his girlfriend.Now he just wants to be single for a bit and it has been that way for about 2months now.But i want to be with him so much.Things still happpen under wraps though and I am getting to the point of thinking that i may as well give up because it is so hard for me.Recently i ended up getting close to a mutual guy friend which only made me want this guy more. I didnt want anyone but him. But he on the same night ended up getting with a girl that we both know. She is also kind of into him but he has assured me he doesnt want her at all. And that nothing is going on.When we are together he is so sweet and affectionate and we never meet and go straight into the sexual side. But why can he not be open that he likes me and why is being single so important?He is a natural flirt and to be honest he is not a majorly attractive guy and many people say that they have no idea why i am into him but i am.Do you guys think that he will ever come round and tell me that he wants me? Or is he using me for a casual thing? I dont want to think that as I know he could get this other girl far more easily than me but he insists on keeping me around and its me not her. But should I stay and wait around for him or someone better to come along or just give up totally? He has always said he cant say if we will be together in the future cos he cant expect me to wait around but he hopes i will...i know the story of having your cake and eating it too but we are really close friends. And he knows all of my past and secrets and i know his.There is more than just a relationship on the line but a great friendship too...Please help mex x x x x
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, sleepyhollow  +, writes (8 May 2007):
Now ask yourself this question:
Do you really want to be with a guy who cheated on his previous girlfriend?
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