A
female
age
36-40,
*hannon222
writes:I have a close friend that I'm starting to like more than a friend. He has always been open that he liked me, but I've always kept my feeling in check. We have a really good connection and can talk for hours and just make each other laugh. Which I love about him. We have only been friends for about a year and a half, and last year he and other friends helped me through me and my ex's breakup. And I love them all for being there for me. But the only problem (and its a big one)is that he is stuck in a relationship that he doesn't really want to be in. He has a house with this girl and would pretty much have to pay her to breakup. I've met his gf and she is really sweet, but the whole time we have been friends, he has never acted happy with her. He is extremely smart and he kind of runs over her with his conversation and she always gets upset. I've told him multiple times(and so has everyone else in our group of friends) that if he is unhappy and doesn't see a future with her then he needs to be honest (which he says he has) with her about it and move on. It's not fair to lead her on.My question is, should I tell him that I return the feelings for him? With my ex, he cheated on me with one of my best friends. And I have always said since then, that I never want to be that other girl. I never want to make anyone feel that hurt. We haven't and will not do anything like cheating. Short of a little light flirting. Me and him joke around sometimes, but we would never actually do anything while he is still with her. We both have too many morals for that. I know that he would probably break up with her if I told him that I had those feelings too. But I don't want to be the reason he breaks up with her. I want him to make that decision on his own. So, I don't know what to do. I could just move past this and find someone else. But I really am starting to like him, and I have not felt this feeling in the pit of my stomach since me and my ex. I think about him all the time now and I kind of light up when he walks in... I can't help it.Should I tell him and feel like a home-wrecker? Or should I just move past this on my own? Please help, and thanks for any advise. I need it!
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male
reader, Boy X  +, writes (3 July 2011):
You should tell him. If he's not happy in his current relationship, he should end it anyway. Tell him, just don't do anything with him until he's split up. Then you wont be the other woman.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2011): I iunderstand how you feel. You're with him a lot and you talk to him a lot. You can't do nothing but start getting attracted to him. Seem as ou tall about everything so you know what goes on in his house. Believe me he knows how you feel about him, he's just waiting for you to say something. I agree you do not want to be the cause of him leaving his home because if it do. not go well with you and him he probably would blame u.
Good luck
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