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male
,
anonymous
writes: I'm in love with one of my best friends, but I'm too scared to do something about it, for fear it might ruin our friendship, what do you think I should do?
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female
reader, xAngeliquex  +, writes (15 August 2006):
 This is exactly the position MY best friend was in with ME. We've been close friends for about 4 years now, and even though he had been hinting that he had stong feelings for me for well over a year, I was clueless - as I thought him inviting me over ALL the time, giving me kisses and cuddles was all because he loved me as a friend.
When told me of these other feelings, I was shocked. But because we have such a strong friendship, I dismissed it and his feelings didn't affect us at all.
It wasn't until now that I realised that I too had these feelings... Now we are together but taking it slow.
All I can say is: If you find out she DOES have feelings for you, don't rush into it for the sake of your friendship. It IS a big risk as you could be jeopardizing your friendship. You understand? Some gf/bf fallouts can be really bad, which could end the friendship forever.
It might end up like that, but I say take the risk if you feel it's worth it and you could be really happy.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2006): I had feelings for one of my best friends. I kept on thinking that I shouldn't do anything because it would ruin things, make him uncomfortable, make me embarrassed, make our mutual friends feel uncomfortable etc etc etc - no doubt all the things that are running through your head right now!!
I let these feelings bubble away for 8 months - fears of getting hurt but also fears of him meeting someone else and me losing my chance also ran through my head.
So I decided that I should try and spend as much time with him as possible to (a) make sure the feelings were real and not just a passing crush (b) to perhaps gauge if he was interested in me (c) give myself opportunities to say something or hint something.
Finally one night, I had the house to myself and I invited him over for dinner and after dinner, when were sitting on the couch, I just asked him "Do you think there is something between us?" and he said yes. He had been having the exact same thoughts and feelings that I had been having.
So, in my opinion, it is worth the risk but take a bit of time to make sure what you are feeling is real opposed to just a bit of lust or a little crush and make sure your approach is not too full on - you don't want to scare them! Just mention that you really enjoy spending time with them and the thought has crossed your mind that maybe you could be more than friends. Keep it light and that way if she is not interested, things won't be too uncomfortable and hopefully it won't affect the friendship.
It's up to you but I took the risk and I'm really glad I did. Good luck.
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