A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I wrote in my other question about how i got raped by my bro in law and my sister chose him over me. And i asked whether if i was right or my sister was. But this time ive got another problem. I am gettin into a serious relationship about who my family knows about and is happy for me and my partner but am not sure whether i should tell him about what happen between me and my bro in law. I'm scared about if i tell him he might not want to be with me any more. Please help me i dont know if i should tell him or not. Please help Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthankyou for all your help. the answers you have given are very helpful to me. i have decided i am going to meet with him 2mrw and tell him everything. like you lot sed i wont tel him who did it.
thankyou very much
xx
A
female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (15 June 2009):
 I think that it would be okay to tell him when you're ready. If he loves and cares about you he will have no problem accepting it, since it wasn't your fault. I probably wouldn't tell him exactly who did it, but that's just me. Trust your gut.
*hug* Good luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2009): I'm sorry to hear about your past, but if the person you are currently with truly cares for you, they will accept what happened to you.
telling your current lover who the perp. is may not be the best thing to do, but at the same time, while telling him what happened to you you are opening new pathways and putting your trust in him. He will, in return, appreciate your trust and you will always have someone to talk about things with if you ever need too.
good luck!
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A
female
reader, baby_tinney +, writes (14 June 2009):
 ok I had a realllly bad childhood I was raped by my moms ex whom she was with from when I was 3 till I was 13 and couldnt take it anymore.And finaly was just like ok dead is better then this so I told my mom. I think this is going to come down to you.I told my husband but it was becouse I still pull away somtimes and have nightmares.You could always tell him and just not tell him whom it was.That way if it ever comes out later that this hapend to you he wont think you was keeping things from him.It always helps to talk about it and somtimes having somone to fall upon is the key to getting over things.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2009): You can tell him you were raped, but I wouldn't tell him who by.
I went through this with my brother. I never told my husband becuase i knew he'd murder him.. literally, and i really don't want any hostility like that in the family. I don't know.. this may be the wrong asnwer for you.. but i'm just telling you what i would do personally, which is somethign i don't usually do when i'm answering posts. It really depends on your situation though.
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