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female
,
anonymous
writes: hey, i was wondering if anyone can help me. i went out with this guy for about 3 months and then he dumped me and on valentine's day. my friend introduced him to one of her friends and he started going out with her about 2 weeks after he dumped me and then about 6 months later dumped her. he now says he wants me back and although we are close friends i don't know if i feel the same way. as he hurt me when he dumped me and he didn't speak to me for the duration he went out with this other girl. now he says he is in love with me and really wants me to take him back but i don't know if i like him as more than a friend, i think i am happy to have him back as a friend now but i don't know. Anyone got any ideas? thank you. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, LISAG +, writes (3 November 2006):
 Just remember that this guy took whole stock of you and your qualities and decided he'd finish it. Now, he may be having second thoughts about you and regreting his decision, but what's to stop him doing the same thing again in the future when some other girl comes along that takes his fancy ? If I were you I'd keep it as friends, saves you possibly going through the same scenario again and it sounds like you are unsure of him, I mean who wouldn't be ? Especially as he didnt bother speaking to you for months ! I mean what sort of a friend is that ? I think you can find someone better... always remember that some men will say what you want to hear (i.e. I love you) just to get their own way. Good luck, there's many many great men out there and I suspect you are pretty young and have your whole life ahead of you ? !!
A
female
reader, ginger-- +, writes (3 November 2006):
 if you only like him as a friend
then keep it that wayy
Ive had this happen to me before
and ask yourself this
do you really want to ruin your friendship with him
after you guys stop dating???
give it a while and see if he really does care for you, and if he'll hurt you againn.
just give it timme
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A
female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (3 November 2006):
 Yes dear I undesrtand you like him still and I know because this happened to me that's why I'm scared of him hurting you very much maybe it is worth trying but a new start is good though if you wanna give him a go then to be friends is ok but I think yuour still in love, take care
xxxxx
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your advice kelly, i think i knew all along what i wanted but felt the need to think it through. Astrid i don't think you quite understood what i was on about i want to be this guys friend.
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A
female
reader, Astrid +, writes (31 October 2006):
I would recommend not to be friends even he cannot have you back as the old toy he threw away on VALENTINE'S DAYYY!! he's a son of ''not a lady'' I would not even talk to him
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your advice kelly :) it all makes sense now
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A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (31 October 2006):
 Hi,
I think you are skeptical about this guy and i would too. Your heart tells u for now to stay his friend and i think that is the right thing to do. Trust ur intuition. when u have a doubled mind about something it might be better for you not to do it. I do believe this guy isnt stable in relationships and doesnt know what he wants. I think u should be careful here and u are really smart to reason this through.
Goodluck dear
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