A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i have been dating my gf for 3 years and before me she had an ex bf who she had sex with..she was my first by the way..we recently broke up and have been for about 3 months..during this time she was reunited with her ex bf..he got her drunk one night and had sex with her..she hates his guts now and never wants to talk to him again..me and her are talking about getting back together cuz we still have strong feelings for eachother..but when i found out about her having sex with him it changed a lot and it hurts very bad...should i get back with her?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell recently she has been wanting to get back with me but wanted a few days to make sure if it was what she really wanted..she sai she most likely will cuz she misses me a lot..well in this time i happened to run into her ex bf and i got extremly mad and beat his ass..i told her what i did to him and she got very mad that i hurt him after she told me not to do nething to him even though she dislikes him also..she said my chances with her are ruined now
A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx  +, writes (26 March 2007):
 The circumstances of this one are very difficult. Had she not been drunk and had chosen to do this with him of her own free will, I would say stay well away, as a person who can jump straight into bed with someone else stright after a split to someone they claim to love is not worth it. However, if this really did happen the way she said it did, ie. she was drunk and he took advantage, I may have a different answer.
Firstly, you must ask whether you believe it was the alcohol that was to blame for what she did. He didn't force her to have sex with him and some people say you do what you really want to when you're drunk, as your inhibitions are lowered. Could she be saying she was drunk and he took advantage just so you'll take her back? Is it at all possible that she wanted to sleep with him, drunk or not?
If you're sure she is telling you the truth and was drunk and really didn't want this, you must ask yourself whether you can honestly get over this and move past it. Can you trust this girl after this? If you can't see this problem going away, what's the point in putting each other through it? Go your separate ways now before you get hurt even more.
But if you can forgive and you can trust her again and believe this can work, go for it. You'll only regret it if you let her walk just because you're childishly digging your heels in about something that was a mistake.
Only you know her and only you know you. Can you forget this? Can you move on? Or do you, deep down, know she wanted him all along? Answer these questions honestly for your answer.
Good luck and let me know what you decide.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (26 March 2007):
 It depends if you feel you can trust her. Technically she didn't do anything wrong. You were broken up and she was free to have sex with whoever she wants to. However you can't get back together with her unless you can get past what went on when you were apart but if you truly love her this should be easy enough.
CD
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