A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend are in a sort of a long distance relationship. He lives with his parents, but also keeps a flat in the city where his university is. Lucky for me, I'm living in the middle, so when he goes home or back, he spends some time with me. It's 2-3x a month for 2-5 days, so not bad at all. Also the train tickets are a quarter of their normal price on this route for him (student discount).The thing it, this year he will be getting his bachelor's degree and he wants to go to a different university for his masters next year. It is a great school and I fully support him, but it's in the opposite direction than I live and the tickets can get pretty expensive without his discount. I'm afraid we won't be able to see each other as much.I had this crazy idea. What if we find a place to live together where he'll be studying? I will need to find a job and get a brand new clientelle (I'm partially self-employed), but it's not impossible. I have a couple of good friends living there. He's pretty much supported by his parents (between his difficult school and a medical problem he just dosen't have the energy), but if we split the rent evenly I can't imagine they would mind? If the money was the same as if he had a roommate... They really like me.We've known each other for 7 years, were close friends for 3 years and now we're together for 6 months and everything is so perfect I have a hard time wrapping my head around it. We also spend a lot of time calling each other (8+hrs a week) and I never felt this close to anybody. I never felt so loved or cared about. He always says that with me he can properly rest and that he leaves feeling better and healthier than when he came.I don't want to bring this up before the exams because I fear he may subconsciously sabotage himself if he realized we may have problems seeing eachother if he succeeds. I wouldn't want that. So I'm asking here - is this just a silly idea and I shouldn't get my hopes up, or do you see it as something that may actually work?
View related questions:
long distance, money, roommate, university Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (17 January 2015):
 I think it's a good idea to suggest if you've had talked about marriage before. Being best buddies and familiar with each other does not guarantee that he wants to marry you in the future. Your feelings have to be the same so that you can be assured that if you run into arguments you would always work it out and stick with each other. I would not move in with him if the direction is not going towards marriage at the end. I know that's what I would want. If your idea is companionship and not too worried about the outcome I would say it's harmless but if your heart is invested then you would get hurt when you part ways. Still, you have to ask as a gesture of loving him, not exactly proposing but letting him know you want him in your life. It could be the question that makes or breaks the relationship. At least you know now. Some people can do long distance but you have the right to voice out that you prefer not to risk it.
|
