A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating this guy for four months now. I want to know if we are going steady because he has never come out and said that I was his girlfriend. His friends wife asured me that there was no one else he was dating. They have been friends for years and her husband and him work together so i'm pretty sure she would know about it. I did ask him if he was sleeping with other people he said no. I think I made him feel weird about it. He kind of looked shocked about what I asked. He said how much time do you think I have. I told him he was the only one I was sleeping with as well. Do you think that means we are going steady? He could have lied.I mean just because he is only sleeping with me don't mean that he turns down dates. It's one thing to date other people but to sleep with a bunch of people at the same time is not cool to me. and dating someone most likly leads to sex right? Should I stop sleeping with him until he tells me i'm his girlfriend? Or is his not telling me that were steady normal man stuff? I have never dated someone this long without them verifing that we are a couple.I realy like this guy maybe he is scared to commit or something or maybe he is a player please any guys out there give me some advice on man laws. thanks
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Jmo  +, writes (27 March 2008):
 If he seemed shocked about you asking him about sleeping with other people and his friend's wife assured you he was not dating anyone else, he probably considers you his girl. Some people assume spending all your time together equals a relationship, some do not. (For instance, I've hurt quite a few guys in my life because they thought we were in a relationship and I didn't.) Obviously, you're the type of person who needs this kind of clarity, so I suggest taking a less passive role in finding out where you stand. ASK HIM. Tell him where you stand and ask him what he thinks about it. I'm sure you have nothing to worry about and are just feeling a bit insecure. You'll feel relieved once you put this issue to rest.
Best of luck..... although I don't think you need it.
-Jmo
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