A
female
age
36-40,
*velangel
writes:I am 19 and have met a guy (45) who is really nice and i am friends with but latley we have started to kiss and touch each other. Is this ok or should i stop before it gets out of hand?? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Nodrog2  +, writes (7 November 2007):
Who was the famous film actress who said "Darling, you're only as old as the man you feel"? In her case of course it was the 'other way around' and she was justifying the age gap between herself and the young men she kept dating; but I think the same applies here - but in this case the 'age gap' is on YOUR side! I may be wrong, but the way you have posed your question suggests that you haven't had very much experience with men, so just be careful - and don't take EVERYTHING he tells you as 'gospel'or you might get a few nasty surprises! And at this stage, don't make him 'the only one'. Go out with other guys (including some of your own age)Have fun, keep it all 'light'- You've a whole life ahead of you, so bear that in mind too! Warmest wishes.
A
male
reader, Dr. John  +, writes (7 November 2007):
 I met a 22 year old girl one day who was surrounded by children. She told me they were her grandchildren!
I was somewhat surprised to say the least, but she explained that actually they were her step-grandchildren. Her husband was 45 at that time and they had been married two years. Last I heard they were still very much in love and getting on very well.
Age is obviously not a barrier in their relationship. Doc
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A
female
reader, dancing_boo +, writes (7 November 2007):
 Evelangel...I would advise simular to Kenny in the respect that age is purely a number and that problems lie when the two involved are at different stages in their lives. What i would say is bear in mind his age and yours, and if he wants more children. If he wants children, when? Would this be too soon for you? Or too late for him? These are questions that you need to address...with him, and talk about the issues facing a relationship with someone more than likely your parents age. But ultimatley, feelings should control this relationship.
If you are keen to pursue, do so and fight the battles which may arise. If you love each other, what else matters?
I personnaly was in a relationship with 20 years difference, and the age gap played no factor in the seperation.
As long as you and your partner dont find it a problem, then all the problems are external to you both, just outer opinions. Just keep reminding yourself, family and friends how much he mean to you, and how happy you are to give things a try.
At the end of the day, if you dont pursue it, you may live in regret.
Best of luck, and i hope things work out which ever route you decide.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (6 November 2007):
 Age gaps invariably only ever become a problem if either of the people in question have got issues with its. I am a believer that the feelings and love between two people far supesede how many number between them. Its quite a big age gap of 26 years between the pair of you, but if you are ok with it then there is no reason why it could not work out. Normally with this sort of age gap the only thing that would make it fail is the different stages of your lives you are both at. For instance you may be at the stage where you are hitting the clubbing & pubbing scene with your mates every friday and saturday, where as he might want a nice relaxing night in with a nice meal and a nice bottle of wine. Not saying this is you two, just giving you a typical scenario. If you feel comfortable with him then there is no reason why you should stop kissing or touching. If it feels right keep going and see what happens.
All the best of luck x
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A
female
reader, confused in WVa +, writes (6 November 2007):
 Hon, if you felt comfortable with the situation, you wouldn't be asking. What would your father say? Or your mother? Make him stay away before you get hurt. Take care and God Bless.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy +, writes (6 November 2007):
 Hi,
You are doing nothing illegal, so its your call.
You need to decide if you just want a fling, or if you are interested in a relationship.
If its the latter, what will a 45 year old guy have in common with you, imagine introducing him to your friends, most will have parents that are younger than him.
Think about it, also what level of maturity is this guy?
Basically its up to you, if you are both interested in a bit of no strings sex, then what the hell. Otherwise you have to seriously consider what your future holds.
At 29 you will be still several years away from your peak, he will be approaching retirement.
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