A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I started dating my fiance when i was in high school. He has been my first everything, and we've been together for almost 6 years. He is a great guy, very nice. But I find myself bored with him. The sex has never been good we've tried everything.. And our relationship has been at the "comfortable" status for years now. Nothing is new, he doesn't want anything new. And I can't keep my mind from wandering. This isn't new, I'm always wishing i could go out and date. I want to try living single, and being a normal young twenty something. I don't know if I'm staying with him because its all I know, or because I want to marry him. He is my best friend...I have no idea what to do. I'm so scared of leaving him because I've never known anything else, and being with him is comfortable. But I want something new, I want to see whats out there...
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female
reader, AngellicaWaters +, writes (30 October 2009):
 I would say take a break from him (a couple of weeks). Take a vacation or tell him you have things you need to think about and need some space. See how you feel being away from him. You only know what it's like to be with him, so take some time to be apart and see how that feels.
After that, you can make a decision on whether you want more alone time or to be with him. Don't take any longer than that or you will just be stringing him along and that would be disrespectful of him.
All relationships go through less exciting periods, but it's important for both individuals to put the effort in to renew the relationship and contribute to make it more exciting (sometimes though even if you make the effort, it's still not enough). You could try taking a class together or setting a specific date night/day and going out to new/exciting places together.
Friendship is wonderful if you have passion too, but friendship alone is just friendship and you can do that still with your ex. and have both friendship and passion with someone else. You do have to work on the passion part, no matter what relationship you are in though.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2009): I think it is pretty rare for a romance started in high school to last for many years as in marriage because people change a lot from what they were in high school and it is difficult not to outgrow someone you met when you were a different person.
We can't really tell you what to do here, you are just going to have to listen to your heart or listen to your head and right now the two are at war.
I suggest going somewhere quiet where you can be alone with your thoughts and decide what you want to do.
Don't let fear of the unknown hold you back, but figure out what your core values are and what you really want to accomplish for yourself in life as that is a good starting place I think.
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A
male
reader, Trans Am Man +, writes (30 October 2009):
 Well it sounds to me like he loves you, if you leave him, you'll break his heart. Of course you're gonna get bored with him. You'll get bored with anyone after being together for so long. You should stay.
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