A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have a boyfriend who I have been with for about a year and three months, I can honestly say I am so in love with him it's hard because he is 5 hours away because he is in the navy. He is from where I live, since he came into my life he because so special right away I knew I wanted nothing more then him, I was ready I would have married him I would have had his child without a doubt knowing he was my soulmate. The saddest part is he broke the trust since the start and I kind of brushed it off because I was in love. He did things like not contact me when at a concert or tell me he was to drunk to reply the whole night, I think what hurts he most is knowing I didn't matter like if he cared he would have reassured me a little bit. I know I'm a beautiful girl who can seek any man I'd want, but there's something about him even after all he's done to me. The saddest thing is my tolerance level for it all he's hurt me so much yet I stay if any other guy came at me like that believe me I would drop all contact no hesitation, so why have I let him hurt me and lie to me a couple of times. I just feel like it got to the point where I held so much in I sort of hate him for hurting me this much and doing me this wrong. I just don't believe we will ever be happy since the trust was broken since the start, and the hurt is there, I just don't know what to do. I tell him I'm done and to leave me alone and his response is no you're not you love me, and I do but I know that even if it hurts to let go I'll heal one day. I just don't know what to do, him being away and keeping stuff was definitely a slap to my face, he just showed me I was nothing to him like if I would have mattered he would have acted right , right ? I just need some advice , thank you !
View related questions:
drunk, move on, navy, soulmate Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (7 April 2017):
 If you are so beautiful and can get any other guy you want then go ahead and do that, but honestly if you are not going to trust a guy because he didn't contact you if he was out drinking or at a concert then believe me you are never going to be happy.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (5 April 2017):
 Love isn't enough. For a relationship to be a good one, there needs to be more.
...............................
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (5 April 2017):
 I am not sure I understood how did he break your trust , doing what. Maybe there's more to the story, other episodes that you do not mention ,to make you so hurt and upset.
Otherwise, if we have to go strictly by what you mention in your post , I have to say : What ? ... Seriously ?
Why should he be texting you from a concert ?? who does that ? A concert only last 2 hours, maybe 3, let's make it 4 for if it's ,like, a Bruce Springsteen concert :) .. can't you guys stay focused on the entertainment and survive without touching base for just a a few hours ?..
Is he also supposed to text you from the inside of the movie theatre when he goes to see a film ?
As for being too drunk all night to make small talk, well, personally what would bother ME would be having a bf who's drunk all night , whether he communicates or not, then again I don't come from a drinking culture, and your bf is a seaman, there must be a reason why people say " drunk as a sailor " :). If he was heavily intoxicated, it makes sense that he did not feel up for conversation, or that he totally forgot. Some people get chatty when they are drunk, others are the total opposite and conversation is too much of an effort for them.
Unless this is just the tip of the iceberg, and there are other instances where he showed that he is not to be trusted, or that he is likely to neglect you ... I must say too that you come across as very needy and very clingy.
Work on yourself to try and change that, - whether you leave this guy or not. Relax, give them some breathing space, do not take umbrage if they don't give you the running commentary of every single outing of their life.
People want to be loved, not to be surveilled !
...............................
A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (5 April 2017):
 Am I reading this correctly?
He has broke your trust by not messaging you when he's at a concert or he's drunk? Those are the reasons your relationship is failing?
I'm sorry but that made me laugh. If that's all you're worrying about in your relationship then you are over reacting MASSIVELY.
So what if he doesn't message you at a concert? Let the man enjoy himself. Doesn't message you whilst drunk? I think he would do a good job to be able to message you whilst he's under the influence to be fair.
You sound very clingy, I think you need to work on yourself if I'm being honest, your boyfriend is doing nothing at all wrong imo. You need to learn to let your boyfriend have his own space and enjoy time with his friends. I for one wouldn't dream of making a GF text me at all times when she's out with friends or doing something, I would continue my life until she's ready to reply.
If you love your boyfriend as much as you say, I think you will regret breaking up with him over these issues. They're literally not even problems compared to some of the things we see on this website.
...............................
|
