A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:1)My boyfriend and I are both 16. Him and I have connected on an extremely deep level and already talk about marriage and kids. we've been dating for 7 months, and his friends and mom have told me he's planning to propose (they showed me the ring too!)I really want to marry him, I was just looking for peoples opinions about it. 2)Also before him and I got really serious he was planning on going into the marines, but now that we have already mentioned kids, he says that having a family is more important. I feel guilty about him making that decision since he wanted to go into the marines before i was in the picture. It wont be easy if he goes, but what should i do? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2009): I think you guys should wait, too. You have so much ahead of you! What about college? (From what I've seen, it's HARD to be married and go to school.) Don't you want to meet new people and do new things and see what's out there?
If you marry him now, I think you will really regret it because you will miss out on so much. You are so young, and have so much more to experience before you really even know who you are. Wait, and give yourself that chance.
And yes, it is a bad sign that a 16 year old boy's mother isn't against him proposing.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 December 2009): Honestly, what can two 16 year olds possibly do to make a decent living and start a family? The economy is bad enough, but you have no skills, no marketable ones that is.
Please, both of you stay in high school and finish your education, if you want to join the military after that, then fine, but you might want to consider furthering you education past high school so that you can have a way to support yourselves and options in life because you never know what kind of curves life will hand you.
If he is that mature to get married and that in love with you then he can wait a few years to actually propose. I really think this is a horrible idea for many reasons. One of which that it is extremely rare for romances started this young in life to last as you have a lot of growing and maturing to do and you will not be the same to person that you are today at 20, 25, 35 and you have to have the maturity and life experience to know what you want and who you are, as well as being able to be able to have a relationship that allows both people to grow but not grow apart. Having children this young when you are both still children yourselves really, will put a tremendous strain on your relationship and on your pocketbooks and likely your children will grow up in poverty. That is unless you were both born with a silver spoon in your mouths, and that doesn't sound likely.
Do not accept the proposal, please.
...............................
A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (14 December 2009):
 Run Away!! Any boy who has a mother who is quite prepared for him to get engaged at such a young age is not going to go anywhere fast.
Although, of course, she may be just trying to keep him from joining the Marines, which kinda sorta makes sense, but run away anyway and give her a chance and time to find a different girl for him to marry.
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (14 December 2009):
It's very easy to say he'll give up his dreams. But he is a young man, and you're still young too. It's great that he wants to propose and have a future, but before anything else, you both need to make sure you have good plans for that future. What is he doing to do now he's not going into the marines, for example? I think you can afford to take a little more time and be sure of what you both want from life.
...............................
|
