A
female
age
30-35,
*dee
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now. So far it has been a little strange as we both live in different countries in europe. Me in London and he in Holland. But we have managed to keep it going. When we are together things are absolutely perfect and he's lovely. But it is when i am home that things get bad, i get quite depressed. He puts absolutely no effort when we are apart. i get no texts, phone calls. He never sends letters or emails. He excuse is always that he is busy. But how busy do you have to be not to get chance to send your girlfriend a small text? W e talk about once a week and it's me paying the phyone bills. I feel so unwanted, but when we see each other he truly is the perfect. In 3 weeks i will be moving to his country and will be a 5 minute walk away, a big difference from 300 miles. He really doesn't seem supportive or excited about my move. He is putting me off going. Is there any point in staying with this guy when i get there?
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depressed, different countries, long distance, text Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Annonymous777  +, writes (3 June 2010):
Yeah long distance relationships are hard and it could be that he grew distant in your time apart but everytime he saw you his feelings came rushing back. If he does treat you better and he keeps it up and your happy then i would stay with him despite how he was while you were long distance.
A
female
reader, Edee +, writes (3 June 2010):
Edee is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI honestly think he is just to lazy, busy and Dutch to be having anything on the side. We'll see what happens when I move over there. I just hope I wont be too blinded by his attentiveness to forget how he has treated me over the past 10 months!
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (3 June 2010):
 Well,frankly,from what you tell us, no,there is no point.
Hopefully you had other reasons beyond him to move to his country ?...
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A
male
reader, anonymousboi  +, writes (3 June 2010):
to be honest this man is a waste of time. in all relationships there always something good about someone . but probably he's a snake he cant even send you a bloody text sayin i miss you or whatever or phone call that's just ridiculous he's busy with other girls . it doesn't take u that long to text a msg or have a phone call before you sleep and the think is he makes you pay , this man is insane not interested i think . what kind of bf is not happy their gf is moving 5 mins away making an effort to see his ass. well the way i think of it is his got a new gf/ fuk buddy who knows , doesn't sound like he misses you one bit he shows no commitment what so ever .well hope this helps its what i think
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2010): It does give the impression that he is not very into you. This is just a theory I have: He is only attentive the odd time you guys get to see each other but not when you are apart. You would think he would be really excited for you to be moving together so he could always see you but hes not. It sounds to me like he might be having his cake and eating it too if you no what i mean. He has the convienience of a loving girlfriend when its convienient for him but when your not around he can do whatever he wants with whoevr he wants. Its basically like he ats like hes in a relationship only when its convienient for him. Now that your moving, he wont be able to have all this stuff on the side anymore which may be why hes not happy with your move. Im not saying this is what is going on but it is what makes sense to me. I would see what it is like once your there. You may also hear that he has been cheating if thats the case since you will be so close by. If he still seems uninterseted, i would leave the relationship . Even if he has stayed completly faithful, you deserve someone who cares about you, and whats to talk and hang out with you.
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