A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:Ladies I need your help, a woman, I've been out with four times now, we just,made love,that's what's I called it, she told me today, that when she gets close to a guy she, run's, so I am falling, she's wonderful, should I run, I feel so good inside. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, no nonsense Aidan  +, writes (2 November 2015):
I agree entirely with Ivyblue. The important question is why she runs and what can give her the reassurance not to do so. To be honest, there are 2 possible reasons why she told you this: she either did so in a spirit of honesty to show you that she also cares for you and that this feels somehow different, or because she is already thinking that she might do the same thing again. I lean towards the latter, to be truthful. Perhaps she admits it because giving you an advanced warning makes it easier to do it. What’s absolutely clear to me, though, is that you’ll find the doubt impossible to live with unless you’ve got something concrete from her as to what would help her to stay that you can work with. If she can’t give you anything, then I think it’s very likely she’s going to do it again because there is some kind of commitment issue, in which case it’s best to get out now before you fall harder for her. So you need to tell her that her revelation has worried you and ask her about it. And one final thought: this is moving much too fast. You call it making love, or you could just call it having sex because, however tender it might have been, that’s what you mean. Either way, it’s much too soon to be doing that after only going out 4 times. Something this intense and fast-moving isn’t good for some-one scared of getting close.
I wish you all the very best.
A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (2 November 2015):
 No i don't think you should run just yet. Some insight from her as to why I think is important because whatever the reason it is not only her feelings at stake. If she could tell you then you can work out for yourself whether or not you can give her the reassurance she needs in order to stay put and make a go of things. I guess it would be wise to not to be wearing your heart on your sleeve until she is prepared to meet you half way and discuss the situation. If she is flaky about the whole thing I'd say you have your answer, enjoy the few moments you have spent together, wish her well and move on to someone more committed if that is what you are truly after. All the best.
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