A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My life feels like a vicious circle. My partner and i have recently decided to start a fresh after a 3 month break. We have had a on off relationship for the past 8 yrs. We have a couple of kids together who are both still young. It was he who suggested we try again, i had me reservations as we hadnt been seeing eye to eye and different ideas about relationships, he lives seperate from me and our children. The last week or so a feel a decline in us again. He looks after our 2 kids 4 eve s a week while i work and come the weekend he goes out often to come back drunk, when i confronted him about this he accused me of not allowing him to be who he wants to be, he says he has the kids and deserves his time. He doesnt seem much interested in me and him being alone and blames the kids for it. Im not happy living this way and he doesnt see the problem. I also have issues with him regarding his ex. It seems whenever he falls out with me he trys to befriend her and when they fall out he befriends me. I feel i am wasting my life on him as im sure he is only with me as he couldnt handle me meeting someone new. Should i carry on and hope it will come good in the end or quit it while i am still young. i am 36 and he is 42?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2011): The bottom line is are you happy with him. The answer seems to be 'not really'. You have a history together so it is easy to slip back into a relationship. But you have issues with him that can not be resolved. I would quit and draw a line. You are settling for an ok relationship rather than having something fulfilling, comforting, enjoyable etc.
A
male
reader, Heisenberg  +, writes (23 March 2011):
I don't think it's unreasonable to ask that he curb his drinking, especially since it adds nothing constructive to your life, your kids lives and your relationship. If it's something he's unwilling to do, or even come to the conclusion himself, I think that pretty much answers your question for you.
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