A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I apologise if this gets long. I have been friends with a guy for nearly 8 years or so and we have been very close. A few years ago we started to get closer and became more intimate to the point we slept together. At the time he wasn't in the right space and we didn't pursue anything further. We remained friends since but weren't as close and barely even met up in the last 2 years but gave always maintained contact. This was until this year when we met up in January and became close again and slept together.This has happened on a few occasions now. We have spoken about this and he has said he is confused about me and doesn't know whether we should give "us" ago. We've agreed there's something between us but haven't gone any further. He had his heart broken a couple of years ago quite badly and im not sure if he is reluctant to give something real a go or if he just genuinely doesn't want to be with me. I don't want to drag this out any longer but I also don't want to push him. I would like to give things a go and if it doesn't work out it doesn't but I'd like to know rather than leaving it a question mark. Do I approach him with this and tell him my thoughts or should I accept that it may never happen and leave it as a question mark? I'm confused which I I'm sure he is too as I don't want to lose our friendship but will we anyway? I appreciate thoughts and help on this. Many thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 May 2015): Thank you honeypie for your advice. I have actually stopped sleeping with him. Not done since Feb. We've kind of just not discussed anything since then. We've met up and continually message etc but just avoided the topic. I just don't think it's healthy to carry on like this it's fustrating. Does this mean we'll never really be friends again as we were?
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (14 May 2015):
 Stop sleeping with him, see if he is still confused.
It really doesn't matter if he has had some bad break ups, EITHER he is interested on MORE then FWB or he is not. You got nothing to lose by talking to him and laying it out there.The whole dynamics of a true friendship has changed and THAT won't just go back to how it was before the sex.
However, if he is still "heart broken" from a bad relationship a COUPLE of years ago, you might JUST be barking up the wrong tree. So first step should be stop with the sex.
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