A
female
age
41-50,
*9agegap
writes:My bf and I have been together for almost a year...recently he's relocated to another country and he's asked me to move with him. We are still going to live separately. I am giving up a career here, but he thinks it's not a bad thing for me to be in the other country given there's a lot of job opportunities there and I can learn how to be independent. He also said that he likes the way things are between us but he doesn't want to change the status (ala get engaged under these circumstances). If I can live with that, he would like me to move. Do you think I should give up what I have and do it?
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female
reader, 19agegap +, writes (25 May 2008):
19agegap is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThe funny thing is, after I've decided to make the move for him....he wants to break up with me ( I have not told him my decision yet). He thinks we want different things (I want to get married..he doesn't) and he said I should find someone else to make things easier for both of us. I hurt a lot cuz I think we are really bonded. He said I have nagged him a lot regarding the marriage question and he can't deal with it anymore. I do realize that 2 pple being happy together is more important than marriage...but there's so many obstacles between us that perhaps it's better to break up. But I hurt very badly and I feel very lost. I'm not a teenager anymore and been through relationships. This bf is someone I see myself growing old with. However, it has ended.......
A
female
reader, MissWendlemoot  +, writes (24 May 2008):
 No, it isn't in your best interest to give up everything for someone else without a commitment from him meaning a ring and a date. What if things went sour after you moved there?
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