A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:olla again!i need people advice!say u have a sister some where in the world ypu've never met but want to, should u? even though to will destroy or strengthen family life?help me Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (22 June 2007):
 Hard to say...you do not go into the specifics of how this would hurt your family. I assume your sister is the product of an affair and that one of your parents wants nothing to do with her, and that is the pain.
My feeling is that you should meet her one day at some point, but I think it would be best to do it when you are older and more independant. It is always good to learn about yourself through your family, but if you go in with expectations it could ruin it for you.
Remember, she may be your sister, but she could be nothing like you, and into trouble that you are not interested in. It could be more than you are ready for.
Keep her contact info handy, and when you are older extend an olive branch.
-Frank B Kermit
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2007): I haven't seen my sister since I was about 7 years old. So I say go for it. If something like meeting a long lost relative could ruin your family then your family isn't likely to last very long anyway. Go see your sister and tell us how it went please.
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (21 June 2007):
 If you really want to meet her then I say go for it.
My dad was adopted and has for the last few years been fascinated in where he came from and has he got any bothers/sisters or nieces/nephews. I support what he is doing as he's been talking about it for years. It would also be nice to know of any diseases in the family and things like that.
He hasn't got to the point of meeting the people he has found out about yet. I don't even think he has contacted them. As far as I know I think both parents are dead. I don't know if he will or wont but i'll be there to support him all the way whatever he decides.
If you don't meet up with your sister will you look back when you are older and wonder what if or why didn't I? If you think you will then I'd go ahead and meet her. We only live once.
Good luck!
xxxxxxxxxxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthnx so much, thats given me summit to think about but wat if this nearly cost you parents to divorce? should you even though it made ur parents stronger?
thnx again
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2007): Hi darling,
its a hard one as i was adopted and i have 2 brothers, I did get to meet them but not untill i was in my 30s.. I had wanted to from the age of 15, but i didnt want to upset my family either. I talked to my mum who wasnt keen on the idea at all in the end after a lot of soul searching i made my decition and after awhile it was all fine and ive now been in contact for over 12 years. Talk with your family sweetheart see how this would affect yours and there lives explain how important this is for you and go from there i hope it all works out for you love good luck and take care lots of love MANDY XXXXX
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