A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 18 years old. I recently found out I am pregnant. My 26 year old boyfriend, who already has a 3 year old son, wants me to have an abortion. He is an amazing father but says we should wait to have a baby until we are ready, do it right, get married first and be more financially stable. This is the first time he has mentioned marriage to me. He has made it very clear throughout our relationship that he is never going to commit. He has sent me on guilt trips, trying to make me feel guilty, asking me to "do it for him." After telling him I want to have this baby he says we should get married, but he still has pryed about abortion. Should I marry this man? Knowing how badly he wants to abort our child? Or is he just afraid to have another child out of wedlock?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2009): Your boyfriend is being responsible. There's a right time for everything, including having children. He's already had one child out of wedlock so he knows this better than you. It's responsible for him to want to marry you. If you're planning on keeping the baby then marry him. If not then get the abortion and save your self from all the difficulty.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2009): Listen to the previous advice, I do not think he is worth it and I also don't think you should abort the baby because he wants you to. Do YOU want the baby is the question? If you have any doubt, keep it. It is a life-and although you are young, if you have the baby you will cope. Sweetie, I don't think he loves you. If he did he would be ecstatic you were pregnant regardless of the circumstances, he should be supporting you, not guilt tripping you. Move on and find your true knight in shining armour who knows how to treat you right.
All the best and let us know how you get on.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2009): If you marry him and abort the baby, you will regret it. You will feel guilty, ashamed, and you will end up hating yourself for it. You will also hate your husband and blame him every day for making you get rid of your baby. The marriage wont last through that. I am only say that because you want to keep the baby. If you didn't, my answer would be completely different. Having children is a very big part of a relationship, if you both are not on agreement on whether or not to have this baby, that is a pretty big deal breaker and I would say that not only should you not marry him, but perhaps you should reevaluate your relationship with him and break up. He sounds very selfish and demanding, and you deserve someone who will want to commit themselves to you whether you were having their baby or not.
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