A
female
age
36-40,
*aiyuri
writes: Why is it not right to fight at a young age? I'm currently 17 years old and dating a 16 years old who is goin to be 17 in Feb. We've dating for a year and one month, those days was the best of my life and the worst. While we been into the roughest fight ever and still havent split up yet. but the part i am worring about is he asked me to marry him when we get out of high school...should i? after the things we been through?i mean i really love him and i really do....
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2007): The thing is, it doesnt matter who you are with, you will have ups and downs and fights, no relationship is perfect, so it will be the same whoever you chose to marry
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2007): Hi Hun,
I agree with frank if you do have to ask then no.
Doubts like this at the start of a relationship will only be the start, If you fall on hard times and the only person you could rely on is your guy could you.
TAKE CARE LOVE MANDY xxxxxxxxxxxx
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A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit +, writes (2 November 2007):
If you have to ask at all, then no, do not get married.
Regardless of age, love just simply is not enough, and if you are fighting this much, your relationship does not sound like it is going to be able to handle it when more of life's major challenges comes. If it were, you would have no doubts like you do now.
-Frank B Kermit
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2007): Why tie yourself down to the one person at such a young age?!? Don't you have any dreams of travelling and seeing the world and what it has to offer before settling down??I mean 6-8 years time is time enough to settle down with that one person. I you don't kno each other well enough in just over a year. Everyone grows up and they have different dreams and ideas to what they had when they were in high school... Think long and had about what and were you want to go wiht your life and if your can see your boyf fitting into it also. Best of luck with everything tho :)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2007): I'm 38 years old now but do remember being in love when I was in high school with a girl that I thought was wonderful, but we fought so incredibly much.
I thought it was normal to fight this much and that love was hard work.
We ended up breaking up and it was very tough at the time. Over time I met other people and went through different experiences with them, eventually breaking up.
With every relatinship, I learned more about myself and about the type of traits in women that I liked / disliked.
Finally one day I met a girl and realized I wanted to marry her. I was more sure about this in the first few days than I had been about any other person. We got married after a few years of living together and have been happy every since.
I'd say it is extremely important that you grow and date other people over time. I have no doubt that you love this person, but it is by experience that you find out what will really make you happy.
For what it is worth, I have two friends who married their high school sweethearts. Both are going through a lot of marriage problems because they were never able to grow. They're both very mature and fun people, but when they're together with their spouses, they revert to a point where it is like they are still in high school. They bicker constantly, they have tons of regrets, and they are pretty miserable.
Good luck, whatever you choose to do and whatever happens, remember, all experiences, even bad ones, are learning experiences that can make you a stronger and better person.
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