A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been pubbing and at house parties recently and I feel incapable of doing anything beyond talking to women. I only have a single humble objective, I want to make out with a girl before I'm 19. For whatever reason, I mess it up and the girl leaves. I've even been approached by girls and I still fall short. I hate it when I spoil these opportunities, a girl shows blatant interest (or perhaps sympathy) and walks over for a chat. Then she leaves to talk to her girlfriends and I'm back at step one.People say to me that I should "go for it", but what the hell do they mean? I should lean in for a kiss ASAP? I should unsubtly flirt? Maybe previous rejection has made me afraid of giving compliments, or thinking that a girl could ever fancy me. I'm inexperienced and I feel like the only one over the age of 16 that has never had or messed up opportunities.Should I man up and "go for it" whatever it means?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2011): As a female I would prefer compliments than just diving in for a kiss. Compliments can win over girls easily. Then if it feels right and she's smiling and in to you lean in for a kiss.
A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (2 May 2011):
 When they say go for it I think they mean that when you are talking to the girl somewhere in the middle of a sentence you just go in and kiss her. This is in my opinion the best way to have a first kiss with someone but it does pose a risk. If she didn't want it a slap may follow but there is always the chance that it will win the girl over.
You have to do what you are comfortable with, maybe step just outside your comfort zone but too far out may cause you to freeze up.
If you can surely tell that the girl is interested like you have described then I think you should go for the kiss. Just be gentle and brush her shoulders, nothing too forceful.
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