A
female
age
36-40,
*vil ex
writes:I am on my second marriage. During my first marriage, my spouse and I each had affairs. Obviously we had a lot of issues and thats why we got divorced. I initiated the divorce and i got married to a friend of ours. I have been married again for 4 years. the first marriage was 2 years. My ex never changed his email info so i can see the things he does and even though it is wrong, i cannot stop looking. I mean, granted i only check like once every 6 months, but he is in a committed relationship with a woman who i actually think is quite sweet and genuinly seems to love him. I know that he is sleeping around on her based on emails and pictures he has stored. well, i feel like i should accidently foward these things to her and save her from being hurt later down the road when she is even more committed to him. Its not right that he isn't treating her the way she deserves. Am i wrong to do this and try to help her realize she is being cheated on?
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affair, divorce, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 October 2010): I talked to him last night and i admitted i could read his emails. He said he didn't care and had no intention of changing his password. Apparently he likes knowing I can check in. all i know is, i'm done with that. Its not healthy. I don't want that kind of negative relationship.
~evil ex
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 October 2010):
 Nope. What you did in order to find this out is illegal and.... stupid.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): No as u found out the wrong way.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2010): Don't tell her. It is none of your business. And examine your motives for doing so. And realise she is not you.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (18 October 2010):
No, not at all. It's bad for her that he's doing this, but it's an even worse sign that you're re-married and you're checking on your ex husband! You're not physically cheating, but what happens the day your husband walks in and sees you're checking your ex's emails. He's going to think you're not over him, and that will be the end of your second marriage. Also, if you do say something, you'll be seen as the vindictive ex who has been spying and making up lies.
More than anything else, you need to stop looking at your ex's life. You're supposed to have moved on.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (18 October 2010):
 Nope, dont approach her, but if you have a grain of decency in you you could let him know you are able to read his emails, and that he should change his passwords.
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