A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey I have a question should I let him go?? .......Ima try to Make it short :)Ok so there's this Guy who I have history with. Going on 4 years. When we meet he had a gf so we became friends than we lost contact than like 10 months later we found eachother and everything was great!! We became so close And We also Gained feeling for eachother, so than we had sex. He was my second ( I'm 20 by the way ) and all of This went on for 8 months. Than we stop talking because We had a big disagreement. We Stop talking for 8/9 months. Than we started back And I was happy because during That time I was single And lonely. I couldn't find a Guy That I like. I waited for 5 months than I tried the last couple of months, still nothing. I was sad about That my friends was calling me miserable and lonely because They found boyfriends that they was saying They loved so much, so that made me feel worse! But when me and the Guy started back talk we told each other how We felt and I was happy, Finally someone for me. But he went away for college after 2/3 months and I thought I didn't want him because When he told me he was going away for college I didn't think it would work (I'm staying in my city for college) so we told each other we loved one another but I Also told him I didn't want to be with him because he was leaving but I still love him. So were still close but now my best friend is telling me that he's on fb writing a status about a girl or Some lyrics to a song? I'm Not jealous, but I just feel hurt. And I'm asking my friends for advice the only thing They can say is move on, you can do better, why do I care/love him, or Idk!! That pissed me off because when They blow up my phone over the guys They love calls them bitches or slut or disrespect them or anything I'm always there try to tell them what I think. But when I ask them its who cares?!? Sometimes I feel like they want me to be alone forever!!!!!!! I already feel Like I am since my best friend told me about his fb status. But When I talk to him Like 5 days ago he was saying he was going through a lot with school so I'm just stuck. But Should I call/text him To see if he's not single? Or Should I just give up on him? I don't want too because we have a strong connection and I do Really feels that he loves me but im also thinking if he did he wouldn't have a new "girl" already. But letting him go will means I'm going to be alone probably 30 years from now. I already haven't had sex in a year and my friends laugh at that also. They say I should have sex with the Guy I love friend because he loves me also but I would never do that. So my question is should i reach out to him or let him go again?? Sorry if its too long
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes u did answer my question, and I said thank you. But I do get what your saying, their are more guys out there. They either have kids, which I don't have nor want any. Have no job, Which means we can can't go on dates and I'm not the type to pay 24/7 or have no car, I don't scream taxi Sooo that means I don't want that. And 2 and a half years is some time to me. I know some ppl know eachother for 3 months and say they love eachother but I guess I have to know him 2 more years to say I love him. I guess I don't love him than 0_o
But I Have met some guys they be having 2 kids and their my age ( 20 if u forgot :p ) so I don't want that. If another Guy came my way And That I liked I would go for him. I wouldn't wait, no no noooo! But Thank you again hopefully ill find him or ill just be with the Guy who I barely know.
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (3 September 2011):
 He's been floating in and out of your life for the past 4 years. Stopped talking for 10 months, had sex for 8 months straight, then stopped talking for 8-9 months. So you've known him for about maybe a year and half, maybe 2? It takes years to get to know someone, and that's with contact. None of this off and on business.
You asked a question and I answered. I pointed out that you two don't have anything solid to go off on, so why waste anymore time on him?
My point is there are other guys out there, besides this one guy. Spend the next 30 years solely on him and you just might be alone. Go out there and look for what you want.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for answering!!
But I don't agree with everything you ( tennisstar88 ) say. Your saying I don't know him because we never was in a relationship? How is that even so when we were friends first? I think I know him a great deal. I choose not to be with him when he tried to be with me twice!! But u
Your right About I don't have anyone else, its either guys with kids, no car or a job. Why Should I go For that when I have a car, job and no kids. But I do love him so I disagree with That part. But thank you again :)
I just don't wanna be alone for the next 30 years so I guess I'm a fool lol
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (2 September 2011):
When you first had sex with Guy was he single or dating someone?
I believe you should let him go and move on. Guy has been floating in and out of your life and you two never had anything. Just sex. How are you two going to have love when you haven't had a stable relationship??? You don't know him!
You just want him now in your life because there's no other guy available to you at the moment, and you feel like you need a male in your life. He's got a girlfriend and you two can't seem to have anything stable. As far as I'm concerned he's not an option.
So what if you haven't had sex in about a year? You don't need sex in order to function properly.
My point is let this guy go for good, he's not anything to you but maybe a friend. Leave it at that. Don't try to make something of this, when there's nothing there to begin with.
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A
female
reader, green eyed mulatto +, writes (2 September 2011):
 I think you know what you should do in your heart, sometimes we settled because of lonliness...but when we settle we only cheat ourselves. If you goot back with him just to still be in these cicumstances were you really don't have him the way you need him than you should reflect on why you start dating again in the first place, good luck!
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