A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:my partner and i are together 1yr and 8mths we are deeply in love . he spoils me with every including body massages makes personal love song cds brings me flowers and trys get involved with my 2 children . problem is we argue often and every week without fail and they fights get quiet cruel more so from me i have completely lost trust and passion for him and because of his jealousy i left myself with 0 friends im worried im with him on/off out of sheer lonlyness . my family have warned me leave him as its causing me to be withdrawn im completely torn but when i try break away from him he says he cant see his life without me am i been mently mannipulated by him
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male
reader, rcn  +, writes (21 September 2007):
 With abuse, your family is right. They notice behaviors you don't recognize. But if you love him, there is a chance to turn things around. You're going to have to decided what you are willing to put up with and what you are not. Sit down with him, let him know you're not happy, and renegotiate the boundaries of your relationship. Let him know what behaviors you will not accept at all, then work it from there. Come up with an agreement you will both be happy with, and if he's not willing to, you'll have to say good bye.
A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (21 September 2007):
With abuse, your family is right. They notice behaviors you don't recognize. But if you love him, there is a chance to turn things around. You're going to have to decided what you are willing to put up with and what you are not. Sit down with him, let him know you're not happy, and renegotiate the boundaries of your relationship. Let him know what behaviors you will not accept at all, then work it from there. Come up with an agreement you will both be happy with, and if he's not willing to, you'll have to say good bye.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2007): No you are not being mentally manipulated by him he just wants to ensure that he has you. Next time you guys get in a argument just agree with him that it was your fault or w/e and try to change the subject quickly. Even if you re 100% sure that it isn't your fault just agree with him even about the simplest of arguments. This will be hard at first but after a couple of strong arguments between you 2 and hes realizes once going on the arguing will stop all together, and your relationship will return to normal. Spend more time with each other and creep up on him and give him a back massage whens he least expecting it. Or surprise him in bed one night, trust me all this stuff will get you guys both back in love and all the petty little thoughts that you are thinking now will seem so stupid once you 2 unite as a couple again. I wish you 2 the best of luck, things will work out.
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