A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My current boyfriend of 5 months has an ex who is also the mother of his child of 7months. They talk or text almost everyday "about their son" sure. I asked him did he still love her and he says he do but he is not in love with her. She gets angry if he dont reply to her text (which is after 12 in the morning). On his birthday she gave him a card from the 3month old baby (at that time) saying happy b-day, I love you. I was told she looked better than me by a friend; I asked him and he gave me the inner beauty speak. He visits me atleast 3 times a week. My question is should I just move on to someone else?
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female
reader, jessica04 +, writes (17 March 2009):
 The thing is, you will always have to come second to his child. But that doesn't mean that some limits still shouldn't be set.
If he is committed to you, then his communication with her should only revolve around their son. Of course it's nice that they can be friendly, but unless she is texting him at 2am because the baby is sick, she needs to wait until a decent waking hour.
The thing is though, he has a family that right now doesn't involve you that much. It's up to you to decide how much this bothers you. If it's something you don't feel up for, then please don't put yourself in the middle of it. That will only do harm to everyone involved.
a lot of emotions come into play when a child is involved and the parents aren't together. She will always be in his life because they had a baby together. Unfortunately, until he makes some bigger commitment to you, she is going to be calling the shots. It's not fair, but it sounds like she's that kind of person.
A
female
reader, tired82 +, writes (17 March 2009):
 It's up to you if you should move on to someone else. If the situation you are in bothers you now well just know that it will continue to bother you in the future because she's always going to be in his life due to the child they have in common. About 6 years ago I was in your shoes. I cared for this guy a lot but there was too much drama with his baby momma. She was always calling about something dealing with the child. It got old to me and I couldn't handle it. I wanted him to myself and I knew that wasn't going to happen so I moved on. Found someone with no baggage just like me. It's up to the person involved, no one could tell you otherwise. Go with what your heart tells you. Best of luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2009): think its very difficult for him and you should let him see his son and not worry about her. when you took him on you also took on his son - if you marry you will be a step mum and that brings great responsibility.
doesn't sound like anything wrong to me - you could ask him to cut contact a bit say to once a week or a few days. When she sees someone else it might change. Talk to him.
only you can decide if he is worth it.
Hugs, Star.x.
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