A
female
age
30-35,
*rlandblm8
writes:Two questions in one day, I'm on a roll.Okay, if you haven't read my earlier post, then you probably don't know that i had a misarriage. I had it a week and 1 day ago. My boyfriend's life isn't that great right now, his fathers an alocholi and his mother is afraid to leave him. He wants to leave the state for a while and he wants me to come with him. I want to go with him, not only because he's my boyfriend and I love him, but because i'm in no shape to be around people I know. If you haven't had a miscarriage, you don't know how alinated you feel. And I just really don't want people saying their sorry to me all the time and asking how i'm doing. I want a few days, or weeks to be alone with my boyfriend and his extended family in another state where we can just escape it all.Heres the problem, I'm 17 and although I feel like an adult, i'm always told I am not. My mother knows how I feel and how I just want to get away from it all for a little while. I want to talk to her about going for a little while with him, but i'm afraid she'll say no because she's worried for me. But what she doesn't realize is that I just need time to be away from all the people who patranize me, that I just need a little vacation.In the end, if he leaves, i'm going with him, with or without her permission.Now, i'm not saying i have no respect for my mother and what she says, because I do, I just need to do this for me.See my problem?What do you think?
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male
reader, Red Green 0289 +, writes (23 July 2009):
I think that if the two of you leave town that you're going to find out how VERY HARD it is to make it at your age on your own. Living is expensive and it's hard to earn any kind of a living wage in good time, much less NOW!If he's older you could have legal troubles, but if your 17 probably not... depends on the state laws...What concerns me, is that you feel alinenated. What I'm concerned with is that we feel how we feel where we are... your feelings are not likely to change, and what you're wanting to do is commonly refered to as a "geographic" solution, in which people believe that "my life will get better if I move to...". 99.9% of the time it doesn't work, and the person actually gets worse.I think that you need to take a differnt tact. If your BF needs to get out of this crappy home life (sounds like mine growning up), then see if there's an aunt or uncle in you family that can assist you by renting a room or something. You two could do better by not having to go it on your own... it's hard, and puts alot of pressure on a relationship.GOOD LUCK!
A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (23 July 2009):
 YOu dont seem to have a problem Whats your question really? You wrote "In the end, if he leaves, i'm going with him, with or without her permission."youve already made up your mind, but running away is illegal, your bf and any you stay with could be in trouble for aiding and abetting a runaway so think about what you could put others through you can check up on the laws regarding this to see if theres something that you can use in your favor if your mom says no, but also consider what would happen if you go hurt even something simple as a broken leg,how will you get medical attention do you have insurance etc. good luck hope things work out for you
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