A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've fallen in love with this guy, A. We were seeing each other for two months and then broke up but we hadn't talked through it properly or cleared the air between us, he just seemed like he didn't want to know although he did say he still loved me to bits but still didn't seem like he wanted to speak. Every day when he came online I would make the effort to say hi but he'd say hi and quickly disappear.Later on in the week, I knew he had his eyes on someone else and I was heartbroken to hear that he had kissed another girl quite literally 2-3 days after we broke up.I then felt I had to say something to him about this and said something along the lines of, wow you sure made it look easy to forget someone.. and by this point he seemed interested again saying he regretted it and it was a mistake that 'just happened' and that he'd choose me over her any day. But I wasn't sure if I could forgive him so after a lot of talking and asking how he felt about me, I decided I couldn't take him back and thought it would be for the best.But the next couple of days, after feeling so empty for a whole week and miserable without him, I changed my mind and took him back hoping that he won't ever hurt me again. No matter how much he hurt me don't we all make mistakes? Should I have done this? What are your views?
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2009): because sometimes people mistake the way they feel. That's why people break up. They realize they don't feel the way they thought they did. I've had friends who i used to like and vice versa. Having a crush on someone doesn't mean you can never be with anyone else ever. He's not with you. He's single, but he's still not with her. He says he wants to be with you and you say you want to be with him so what are you waiting for? If you need to, tell him that if he can get his pet to back off, you'll be with him. But you can't if she's there all the damn time.
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe's with her all the time whether we're together or not, she's like his pet always chasing after him.. and he says he doesn't have feelings for her and only for me but he says theyre like best friends and i don't see how they can be just best friends when he's had feelings for her in the past.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2009): So you're not together, and now he's with this girl all the time, but he's still not with her and claims to still have feelings for you and not her? I just want to clear that completely before giving an answer.
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOkay, so we were doing fine and i was seeing him and now we seem to have fallen out again due to the fact that i've been hearing bout him flirting with the same girl which makes me believe somethings still going on so we broke up and now he's with her like all the time but says he has feelings for me n swears blind nothing went on. Is there really any point us getting back together for like, the third time? I clearly can't trust him with her 'cause she's always with him, 24/7 n i know she fancies him like mad. Shall i just forget about him now?
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male
reader, just wondering  +, writes (17 April 2009):
if your view of love is conditional on his mood and loving you to bits after he broke up with you that is not even right. If he wants you back he better be graveling and explaining cause you are worth it. Never date if your lonely and miserable. That is called settling out. When you cook when your sick it is a bare minimum chicken noodle, crackers, ramen noodles. When you feel good then you invite a guest chicken parmesian, crab salad, vegetables and etc. Marriage is a one time deal, life mate. When you date think of it as a championship game and play ball. IF you are having sex with this second time you will really feel used. Make your first statement you need show me what you love me for. I want to be treated like a princess and if he says your crazy know there is someone who will have the confidence. Do not have it out there to get hurt again and then it will feel better getting rid of the jerk cause that is what i think he is and that will be your litmus test. To succeed be in public no home couch or bedroom. Or always have friends around and you will see what his love is.
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2009): I understand that it was very hurtful to you that he kissed someone so shortly after you broke up, but it's better that he kissed her after you broke up instead of during the relationship. He didn't do anything really wrong, he was just insensative. He didn't cheat on you or lie to you about it. He came to you after he explored his other feelings and decided that it was a mistake and after he cleared his head of those questions he asked you to take him back. I don't think there was anything too wrong with it and don't see why, if you like one another, you shouldn't have taken him back.
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