A
male
age
41-50,
*reviasc96
writes:Should i go into marriage, even though i'm not finish my College degree and only earn $120 a week? I would also be going against the better judgment of my Whole family, who thinks i should finish school and get a decent job before i marry. My girlfriend makes good money and said she'll have no problem or any feeling of resentment towards me if we marry now and she has to pay the bills till i graduate and get a job. That sounds great, but i don't agree with a woman providing for her husband. A man is supposed to provide for his woman or at least contribute half financially. i love her so much, but she just doesn't understand my family's point of view.Please let me know what you all think.Thank you :o)
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (28 October 2011):
 I disagree that the man has to provide.
if you and the GF want to marry and you two as a team can afford it then go for it.
FWIW I am way more established then the fiance. He just moved from his home in one state to be with me in another. I make nearly 25k more than him and always will. I have job security and we can survive without him working... he would be the house husband as needed.
He provides much for me however... MONEY is not the only thing a spouse provides.
A
female
reader, fungirl +, writes (28 October 2011):
no because finacial problems is a main cause of divorce for most marriages.and as a man you should be able to stand on your two feet,in heated arguments there may be a time when your better half might say some hurtful remarks if you are incapable to provide for her or yourself so be wise plan ahead and be finacialy secure before marriage marrying for love is important but so is being rational and realistic
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (24 January 2009):
If you are together then you are together. What is the difference between how you are now and how you will be when you are married? It's only a legal contract at the end of the day.
You could stay exactly the same as you are now, even living apart for a while, and the only difference will be your rings and her new name.
If you want to get married then do it, finish your degree and then you can move in together and do all that stuff later.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2009): Just tell her your views, if she doesn't understand, she cannot force you to marry her. Try telling her more about why your family thinks you should wait. Also, if you feel this this way as well, then don't get married. 22-25 is not too old, there's still time to get married, settle down and have kids.
By the way, is it just me, or are people having extra marital sex at a way earlier age nowadays, like 16-20??! There's still time and I'm glad you're choosing to tie the knot before doing any of that stuff. You should be proud!
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A
female
reader, Plexi  +, writes (24 January 2009):
 Wait untill you finish school and get a job. you can get engaged now but postpone till you're finished. theres nothing wrong with a woman being the provider if her man is old or sick and even if you say you are ok with it it will bug you on a subconscious level and it will create problems. same with her, she might say that she doesnt care but puting the woman in the role will change her from whom she is and more problems will arise.
Finish schol and get a job hun, why the rush? get engaged if you want to make it official and give her security but that should be it for now
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 January 2009): I'm sorry but I disagree with your view on a woman providing for her husband, it doesn't make you less of a man to accept help from the woman you're going to spend the rest of your life with, does it? I think she see's your love as way more important than the money you can provide her.
You should both get married when you both want to, simple. As for your fsmily if you do decide to get married before you graduate, make them see that your girlfriend taking care of the bills is just a loan, you could always keep records of what she pays for and pay her back when you get a job.
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